[Image from here.]
Archive for May, 2010
Bertha Dlugi’s invention, patented in 1959, was intended for parakeets and other birds that are allowed to fly freely about the house. “It is … a general object of the present invention to provide a garment to be worn by birds for receiving their excremental discharge to prevent it from being deposited on household furnishings when the bird is at liberty in the home and thereby avoid the consequent unsanitary condition.”
I don’t know about you, but whenever our Fearless Leader speaks, I look around and imagine that he looks like something in our kitchen, like the water cooler. Somehow it makes it all better, because I know that our water cooler has no control over my life.
“Learn that you’ll be goodndave.” Now google “eefing.”
Although Jimmy Riddle was one of the last great Eeefers, the Nashville R&B TV show “Night Train” once featured Joe Perkins‘ “Little Eeefin’ Annie.” Jimmy Riddle was the background “eeefer,” and Perkins lip synched it.
Later on, Jimmy Riddle explained it. [Related post, featuring the Hambone Boys, here.] Now, let’s clear the air a tad, with this:
Yep, that’s the great John Mayall. He kicks it at about 1:50 in. Not exactly hambone or hoodlin’ but he’s got it down. Have a great weekend, folks, see you tomorrow.
Whoa, hold the presses. Just found this excellent clip of Captain Beefheart’s venture into R&B. Now we’re rollin’. Dim the lights, last song, slow dance, ladies’ choice.
I never take a challenge sitting down, so when Steamboat McGoo spotted a black racer on his chimney and asked for estimates on its length, how could I refuse? After all, my ancestors specialized in reptilian length prognostication.
S. McGoo rewarded me with the honor of posting my snake calculations DIRECTLY UNDER HIS BANNER HEADER. (Click on the image unadulterated big to make it.)
Such an honor bestowed requires reciprocity, so I’ve added Aaardvarks & Asshats to our glorious blogroll. You goo, McGo!
Not sure, but I think that’s Pee Wee Herman’s mother.
[Image from here.]
Once upon a time in a land of opportunity someone realized that there was a market for pig machines. Sitting for weeks on end, he pondered the problem before he went to the drafting board and came up with this excellent solution to a puzzle that had been bothering mankind since the first porkers were domesticated: how to adorn a sow with lipstick.
Obviously distraction was a key part of the resulting product, and once the animal was oblivious to its surroundings, one could also measure and weigh it. This data greatly reduced the amount of guessing that coopers required, allowing them to expand their trade, and thus pork barrel spending turned into a booming industry that survives to this day.