If you haven’t read THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE since high school, maybe now is a good time to reread it, given our current economic situation and recent insufferable actions by the current administration.  The Heritage Foundation has an excellent introduction to The Declaration, one of the most influential documents in the history of western civilization.

Since this is our weekly Saturday Matinee, we took a walk through the Utoobage.  The first video that showed up is a very nice professional rendition by a handful of left-wing has-been Hollywood stars and starlets, reciting an EDITED version of the original Declaration, with very convenient omissions… and we’ll NOT post it here.

The next video listed on the Utoobage was well produced also, but devolves within seconds to a criticism of Thomas Jefferson as a slave owner, and, besides ignoring the historical context,  misses the point of The Declaration entirely, and confuses it with the Constitution of the United States. It is in fact the intro to the first video mentioned. We’ll not link to that piece of irrational and inaccurate garbage either.

But then we found this unstilted representation:

Those men, “The Founding Fathers,” had integrity, fortitude, morals, ethics and balls.  They did what they did under threat of being tortured and hanged for treason by the British.

Where can we find such courageous leaders today?  Certainly not in Washington D.C.

“…and the ones Obama gives you don’t do anything at all.”

[With apologies to Grace Slick.]

[Image found here.]

Someone’s about to get pounded, and it’s not the poor soul on the right.  He’s got a pocket force field that rebounds with force x 10.
[Anyone know the story of this dealie? Found here.]

Meanwhile, on a brighter note, the esteemed GE Eagle Esq pointed us to a link on the Beeb:  Raccoons eating “ice lollies.” Can’t embed that one, but it’s cute.

But the UK’s got nothing on US.  Here’s the story from yesterday.  A juvy sea lion with an attitude was captured in Newport Beach, California,  after attempting to pirate a boat, terrorizing children, and refusing to leave the dock.

The sea lion was captured by the Orange County Sheriff’s Harbor Patrol, maneuvered into the fireboat, but it apparently evaded the crew and took the emergency helm in a last ditch effort to humiliate his human captors.  Turned on the sirens, honked the horn, put the vessel in reverse and cranked the throttle to full speed. [Full story here.]

Finally, there’s this, crossposted at Amy Oops:

Lessee, they’ve now got it turned up to 62, 66 & 61 respectively. I had to look at it, so now its you’re turn. Note that the one on the right is also the 5th Baron Haden-Guest, and is still married to Jamie Lee Curtis.  [Spinal Tap ReOnion pic from here.]

YAY! Corduroy flares!
(Looks like fun, but I’d rather be Bert and avoid sniffing the pit.)

[Image found here.]

[Update:  Mrs. Strutts ID'd  Frank Oz on the right, but doesn't know who Ernie's right hand man is.  Of course, that's Jim Henson's in the middle.]

[Update 2:  Welcome Neatoramanauts! Tell the divine Ms. C that Bunk said Howdy.]

[Found here.]

[Found here.]

I found this quarter in my pocket last week. Made my day.  Thanks to whoever you are, and lemme know if you want it back.

Aside from cropping the scanned image, no other adjustments were made. Honest.

Santa Monica, CA (Strutts News Services) – Legendary mariner and celebrity, popularly known as “Popeye” passed away at 2:30AM PST Thursday at St. John’s Health Center in Santa Monica, California.  Leaving behind no documents to prove his full name, Popeye suffered quietly for years from complications caused by hypertension due to  a lifetime of sea salt inhalation.

Popeye’s last words were reported to be, “That’s all’s I can stands, and I can’t stands no more!” before he drifted off.

Popeye is survived by two nephews, Pupeye and Peepeye (71 and 73 respectively).  [Nephews Pipeye and Poopeye disappeared on a fateful mission in search of The Sea Hag and Alice the Goon.  Declared missing in 1982, their whereabouts are unknown, and are presumed to be dead.]

No records remain of his birth, but Popeye claimed, “I’s beborned unner a typhoon off SanMont Pierre during the squall of Nineteen Ought One, in a sabot cast adrift by me pappy. Me mammy succumbed to the wrath.”  Although reported to be blind in his left eye, Popeye had employed his transom and spyglass so often that, in his own words, “me eye got a tad squinky.”

Long time girlfriend Olive Oyl passed away due to anorexia in 1979.  They never married, although Swee’Pea, rumored to be the love-child between Oyl and then boyfriend Harold Hamgravy, was adopted and raised by Popeye as a foundling.  Swee’Pea became a nomadic recluse, whereabouts unknown. No other living relatives are known as records are sparse.

Popeye’s career as a mercenary sailor is spotty, but this is known:  in 1933, word was passed among dockworkers for crew to man a vessel owned by a gambler named Fadewell.  Popeye was subsequently hired by Castor Oyl (Olive’s brother) and Harold Hamgravy (Olive’s boyfriend). Popeye helped pilot the vessel to the Island of Dice, where Fadewell hoped to make a fortune with the luck of a voodoo whiffle hen head.

After an attempted attack on his life by Fadewell’s crony Jack Snork, Popeye disembarked, and never looked back.

Although Popeye generally shunned attention, he accepted an invitation by popular talk-show host Dick Cavett to appear for one rare interview in 1974.  Popeye, in typical fashion, refused to divulge details about his personal life, and spoke mostly about his admiration for Josh Slocum.  Cavett was nonplussed, and politely asked about Popeye’s reputation for liking spinach.

“Ehehehehe,” Popeye chuckled. “That were a mistink in the transcalation. Spinach? Nae, ’twas me spinnaker thet gimme ahoops in 1927. I ates the rime off me sheets ‘n sails.  We had some pemmican tins, but the water raskins was off in the drink.”

God bless you, Popeye.  R.I.P.

[Image found here. Too many sources to list, but they include this, this, and this.  Related posts here.]

Okay, let’s get it out of the way.  I’m talking Michael Jackson.
Click here and here.  Done.

Freedom. Worth fighting for.

Ivan Maximov’s “Rain Down From Above.”  (Found here. For previously posted/linked Maximov animations,  click here.)

Set up smackdown [via].  These guys show up in a couple of other videos, so I suspect it was staged.  I thought it was funny.

Frankie Lymon & the Teenagers live, 1956, and not lip-synching.  (MJ’s dad certainly took notice of Lymon’s talent and success.)  Diana Ross’ 1981 version, complete with Frankie’s eye-roll, is here.

This is bizarre.  Louis Armstrong and Johnny Cash playing a 1930’s Jimmie Rogers song.  The guy who posted this to the Utoobage added this comment:

“I would have never guessed, but Louis Armstrong was a guest on the Johnny Cash Show. This and the story about Satchmo and Jimmie Rogers show how diverse musical tastes these men had and once again that music is a great connector.
This is from episode 38, Oct., 28, 1970 and must be one of Satchmo’s last performances. He was such a great performer right to the end and the Nashville audience and Johnny just loved him.
Louis Armstrong cracks everybody up at the start of the song: ‘Let’s give it to ‘em in black and white.’”

Other news. Two folks on our blogroll could use some words of encouragement.

Chiqui had a stroke, and is recuperating, although he’s lost some use of his hands.  His english is almost as bad as my spanish, but you might want to leave a comment here.  Here’s an alternate link to a (poor) spanish-to-english translation: here.

Crotchety Old Man has some other nasty maladies, but I’m sure he’d like to hear from you, too.  Click here to leave a comment.