Fireproof Your Christmas Tree


Get the flock out! Forget the danger of little Timmy eating lead “icicles,” this stuff allowed many immigrants to light their Christmas trees in the traditional way — with tallow candles — and without burning their houses down.

I assume that this flocking product was intended to be mixed with water and poured or painted over the boughs of den Weihnachtsbaum. Perfectly safe, as long as the faux snow wasn’t friable, and you kept little Timmy from gnawing the needles.

Ahhh. Those were the days, before they invented lead poisoning, asbestosis, DDT toxicity, alar scares, political correctness and AGW pseudo science.

[Found here, crossposted here.]

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11 Responses to “Fireproof Your Christmas Tree”

  1. C Monster Says:


    So you went the Traffic route this week with the music, eh?
    I went with Jeff Beck…he’s a vampire, you know.


  2. theliteraryhorse Says:

    We had that! I can remember my dad holding the box. Geeze….


  3. Bunk Strutts Says:

    C Mon– Sometimes the Saturday Matinee choices are spur of the moment, shoot from the hip impulsive picks. They’re all related, at least in my subconscious.

    thelit– Wow! Did he just dust the tree, or was it mixed with water?


  4. BlackLOG Says:

    It’s a sad world that no longer stocks an item that is

    Cleanest – Whitest – Best

    Just because of a bit of an asbestos association…..

    P.S I can’t believe that you Yanks are worse spellers than me. I actually have to work hard at being this bad, it just seems to come naturally to you lot

    What have you guys got against U for starters

    Color and humor are not a word they are just a bunch of random letters


  5. Bunk Strutts Says:

    BlackLOG– Don’t take the spelling personally. It’s actually a passive-aggressive move directed at the French. From now on, I’ll spell them “collar” and “hummer.”


  6. BlackLOG Says:

    See that’s my kind of spelling, my cunning plan to corrupt the English language is up and running…


  7. Bunk Strutts Says:

    BlackLOG– We’re way ahead of the curve. I’d prefer to keep the spelling but the with grammar instead mess.


  8. wheels Says:

    Given the time of year and the subject of the post, I’d say your grammar got run over by a reindeer.


  9. Bunk Strutts Says:

    wheels– There is absolutely no way I can top that comment, and believe me, I mulled it over for a few minutes. Pure excellence.


  10. planetross Says:

    I think we had that at home as a kid, but all Christmas related stuff came in those 4 color boxes … so I’m not 100% sure or unsure for that matter or material.


  11. Bunk Strutts Says:

    plane– We had boxes of DDT in the garage, but we never messed with asbestos. I think the DDT is still there. No ant/cockroach/mosquito problems ever.


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