Posts Tagged ‘Captain Oblivious’

Captain Oblivious Rides Again

Monday, 11 April 2011

A high-speed drag race. A faulty hood latch. The driver’s view is blocked, and the gaping maw of certain death opens to quench its eternal hunger for blood and souls.

Hurtling through the space-time continuum, warping the laws of physics, a hero arrives in the nick of time.

In possession of unlimited mental powers yet untested, Captain Oblivious wrests the will of the power steering from the speeding vehicle. He laughs in the face of danger. “Ha, ha, ha,” muses Our Hero, as he maneuvers the machine away from peril and toward the relative safety of the raceway’s emergency sand trap.

Unbeknownst to Our Hero, the driver has already panicked. The driver screams as he jams on the brake pedal with both feet, and Captain Oblivious is thrown off at high velocity. Like a watermelon seed pinched between forefinger and thumb, Captain Oblivious is spit from the universe at the speed of whatever. The car slides to a safe stop in the sand.

With his mind swept clean of the memory of recent events, Captain Oblivious finds himself squatting naked in the vapor-ridden 10th dimension, fuzzily pondering his next assignment.

[Image found here; crossposted here.]


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