Capybara Lapwarmer

“Capybara sits on a lady’s knee;
Merry, merry king of the bushy sea.
Lap, capybara! Lap, capybara!
Warm my lap for me.”

Oh wait. That’s the kookaburra song. Australia, Argentina, what’s the difference. Nevermind.

In any case, that’s a big ‘ol honkin’ rodent she’s got there. Think twice or more before you decide that they’re just large guinea pigs:

“Do not let the capys out unless it is within a pen. They will run…they are very fast. It’s best to put the carrier in the pen and open the door. You may have to dump it out because it will hide as far back in the carrier as it can get.

“Remember … this wild animal will go in all directions to get away. It will hit the fence several times, settle and start walking the fence to find a way out. If they have a source of water that will be the first place it will go. If there is a sign of danger in the wild capys escape to the water. They will hide under and around objects.

“Do not concern yourself if they do not eat for a day. Give them a corn on the cob and they will start eating. Any fruits/veggies are fine for them to eat. They need to be fed twice a day with treats around for them to snack on if they get hungry

“They rest a lot during the day and are more active in the evenings. They often have runny stools… do not worry as it is what they eat.

“Do not grab them by the hind legs as you might dislocate a leg. Hold them with your hand and arm under their belly and hand under their neck. Cuddle them and they will settle.”

Note that she’s got a towel to protect herself from runny capyoopsies. Definitely don’t want to mess up that fine upholstery either.

[Image found in here. Quotation found in here.]

[Update 10:30AM – The Capybara Posting Police are out.  See comments below for clarifications.]

[Update 2: We’ve added a special blog category just for you Capy fans.]

Update 3: Here is Caplin Rous (the one in the photo) in action.

Author: Bunk Strutts

Boogah Boogah.

19 thoughts on “Capybara Lapwarmer”

  1. I am the capybara in the photo and that is my owner whose lap I am sitting on. She uses the towel because she was feeding me blueberries and I sometimes drool. I am completely house-trained. I do not have runny stools. I am very friendly. The quote is referring to someone who just got a baby capybara that is not used to being handled. Once we get used to people, we are very friendly. If you read my blog you will get a much better idea for what a pet capybara is like.


  2. You are crazy…if you want to quote me do it in good taste…you took that section from a care sheet for true capy owners…if you do not have or raise them you should never post an idiot statement. I was referring to baby capybaras..not adults…so for the record if you want to post a me for the facts


  3. “During the Christian observation of Lent, capybara meat is especially popular as it is claimed that the Catholic church, in a special dispensation, classified the animal as a fish in the 16th century. There are differing accounts of how the dispensation arose. The most cited refers to a group of 16th Century missionaries who made a request which implied that the semi-aquatic capybara might be a “fish” and also hinted that there would be an issue with starvation if the animal weren’t classified as suitable for Lent.” (from wiki)

    Just thought I’d carry on with the big quotes.

    Bunk: I get similar comments when I put on things about margerine and bonsai trees.


  4. Caplin– Thanks for that clarification. The closest I’ve ever been to a capybara was a stuffed one in an antique shop. Due to the worn-off fur, it seems that the previous owner used it as an ottoman. No respect for the dead. Tell your owner that Bunk said “Hi,” and that our upholstery looks much worse.

    mary lee– I didn’t edit your comment, and I linked to the source where I found it.

    “…if you do not have or raise them you should never post an idiot statement.”

    If you haven’t noticed, this site is all about fun, humor and sarcasm, and not about raising giant rats. The “idiot statement” was yours and I gave you full credit. Merry Christmas.

    Plane– And here I was about to post a snarky comment on how they taste like chicken. Self-restraint pays off when excellent fact-checkers of your caliber to do the dirty work for me. Cheers, and pass the trotters, please. =)


  5. good for you are so correct about capy as a meat source…had the opportunity to eat it in Brazil and it is still a source of food for the Indians in the remote jungle..they call them “water hogs” and it is white meat like a pig…no chicken taste. good comment..hats off to you and this is not a humor comment..fact


  6. mary lee– Everything I’ve read about capybaras talk about long tails that they whip around when threatened. I doubt you’ve raised any capys for 20 years, as their lifespan is only about 12 years in CAPtivity. As for their retractable nostrils, I imagine that they must extend a foot or two vertically while they feed at the bottoms of their breeding ponds. Do you have any pics of the fully extended nostrils? I’d like to update this post.


  7. Well sir I beg your pardon but yes I have raised them that long…I do have more than one in fact I have many breeders. I have Caplins grandpaw age 18 this year. I had capys before him.Go to my web site and look at their nostrils and tails..go to the links and get info. Go to my facebook see the old man and other photos that are not on page. I have sold to many people and do have proof of what I have done…it does not matter anyways as you do not own one or you would know better than a tail that whips..have babies if you need one.


  8. mary lee–

    So what is it about capys that make them whip and snap their tails around to warn predators to stay away from their dams? That behavior fascinates me.

    Thanks again for the info, but I’m not interested in going to facebook to see pictures of old men, and selling/giving away babies is illegal in most western countries. How do you get away with trafficking?


  9. I am done here….I am sure it is all in fun but I am a raiser of capybara and have been for a long time..this is suppose to be a fun site but I am afraid I that I rally do not need a laugh. I am blocking ant other post.
    Thank you


  10. mary lee–

    I hope you realize that this absurd discussion was all in fun. I know nothing about capybaras other than the fact that they hunt down and eat stray children and goats. In Mexico, they call them “las chupacabras.”

    Thanks for visiting here, and you’re always welcome to comment.


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