[First image found here via here; second image (from several years ago) re-discovered here. Third image found here. Fourth here.]
Month: July 2009
12:34:56 7/8/9
Nice observation by Hot Air’s Ed Morrissey:
“I’ve timed this post to go up at 12:34 ET this afternoon in order to celebrate an event that happens twice every hundred years, and happened for the second time today. The clocks will read 12:34:56 on 7/8/9 a mere 56 seconds after this post goes up in the Eastern Time Zone, as they did 12 hours earlier. It’s quirky and esoteric, but also a little bit of fun.
The previous occasion of this kind of sequencing took place in 1978, at 12:34 on May 6th. When that moment arrived, I was rehearsing for a school musical (Bye Bye Birdie), and I had everyone stop and wait out the full minute.”
Episode XVII: Space Smith and Dianna Screw Up and There’s Only One Thing Left To Do…
Babe Magnet: Car d’boardage
When planning to turn a lame ride into something truly sucky, there are only four words to remember: Corrugated Cardboard ‘N’ Duct Tape. (The “N” word doesn’t count.)
So how do we analyze this pathetic attempt at true Babe Magnetage? Hard to say. But there are three likely scenarios.
1. The owner of this Ford POS has absolutely no budget, but works in a parts warehouse with lots of, um, materials at hand. He’s your run-of-the-mill petty thief, specializing in recyclables, and dreams about the world of industrial design while wishing he worked in a fiberglass plant;
2. The owner of the Ford POS got peer-punked by co-dorks who had some off-time when the local Arby’s closed, and decided to give him a high school graduation present consisting of one last mockery;
3. The owner of the Ford POS is a boob who ran out of spray paint to finish it off before attempting to sell the Ford POS on Ebay as an Eddie Bauer Edition.
We predict the project will be abandoned while still in its infancy.
The cardboard spoiler and skirts will be torn off leaving big ol’ honkin’ duct tape marks where the paint used to be, and the owner of the Ford POS will decide to up the ante for True Babe Magnet Status (think flat black spraypaint finish with green and orange fluorescent spackle flames) before he dumps it off on his gullible younger brother for an amount that will take him years to pay off.
Pure efficient genius.
[Image found here. Excellent collection of more Babe Magnetage here.]
P.S. I keep forgetting to use the forbidden word “retarded.”
“So this guy walks into a bar, and… OH, HI!”
Sunday Matinee – To Our Non-Yankee Friends
Following in the footsteps of our Fearless Leader, I must apologize for yesterday’s post, as it addressed my fellow citizens while overlooking our friends around the globe. To make up for this egregious oversight, here are some video picks for everybody.
For Nurse Myra, Phil, Archie & others in and from the land of Oz.
For Herr Eagle. [Vielen Dank für die Ausschreibung. Der Aufstand bewegt sich mit uns Ihre Pläne.]
For Chiqui and others. [Had a difficult time finding a funny video from Spain, as the Utoobage is undergoing some revamping. Video found here.]
The last one is for Rain & Metro and the rest of my friends from Canuckistan.
If I’ve overlooked any of your homelands, let me know in the comments and I’ll make up for it in a future post. (Please respond in English, otherwise it looks like spam.) In other words:
Si je n’ai négligé aucun de vos pays d’origine, faites le moi savoir dans les commentaires et je ferai en place pour lui dans un futur poste. ( S’il vous plaît répondre en anglais, sinon, ça ressemble à du spam.)
Pokud jsem přehlížet jakékoliv vaše vlasti, dejte mi vědět do komentářů a uvidíme se až na to v budoucnu post. ( Odpovězte prosím v angličtině, jinak to vypadá jako spam.)
请回复英文，否则它看起来像垃圾邮件。如果我忽略了您的家园，让我知道的评论中，我会弥补它在未来的职位。
Als ik het heb over een van uw vaderland, laat het me weten in de reacties en ik zal je make-up voor het in een toekomstige functie. (Gelieve te reageren in het Engels, anders is het er uit ziet spam.)
してください英語で、そうでなければ、スパムのように対応しています。もし私はあなたの故郷の見過ごしてきた、私のコメントで知っているが、私は将来のポストを作ってあげることができます。
Если я игнорировать любые Ваши хоумленды, дайте мне знать в комментариях, и я, естественно, составляют для него в будущем пост. (Просьба ответить на Английский, иначе это выглядит как спам.)
Wenn ich übersehen habe jede Ihrer Heimat, lassen Sie mich wissen, in den Kommentaren und ich machen es in einem zukünftigen Post. (Bitte antworten Sie in Englisch, sonst sieht es aus wie Spam.)
Blame any and all mistranslations above on Google Translate.
Your Pal, Bunk
Saturday Matinee: Happy Independence Day!
If you haven’t read THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE since high school, maybe now is a good time to reread it, given our current economic situation and recent insufferable actions by the current administration. The Heritage Foundation has an excellent introduction to The Declaration, one of the most influential documents in the history of western civilization.
Since this is our weekly Saturday Matinee, we took a walk through the Utoobage. The first video that showed up is a very nice professional rendition by a handful of left-wing has-been Hollywood stars and starlets, reciting an EDITED version of the original Declaration, with very convenient omissions… and we’ll NOT post it here.
The next video listed on the Utoobage was well produced also, but devolves within seconds to a criticism of Thomas Jefferson as a slave owner, and, besides ignoring the historical context, misses the point of The Declaration entirely, and confuses it with the Constitution of the United States. It is in fact the intro to the first video mentioned. We’ll not link to that piece of irrational and inaccurate garbage either.
But then we found this unstilted representation:
Those men, “The Founding Fathers,” had integrity, fortitude, morals, ethics and balls. They did what they did under threat of being tortured and hanged for treason by the British.
Where can we find such courageous leaders today? Certainly not in Washington D.C.
.Gif Friday Post No.87 – Ode to Jefferson Airplane
“…and the ones Obama gives you don’t do anything at all.”
[With apologies to Grace Slick.]
Zombie Bachelor Food
[Image found here.]
Un poco de esto, un poco de ése
Someone’s about to get pounded, and it’s not the poor soul on the right. He’s got a pocket force field that rebounds with force x 10.
[Anyone know the story of this dealie? Found here.]
Meanwhile, on a brighter note, the esteemed GE Eagle Esq pointed us to a link on the Beeb: Raccoons eating “ice lollies.” Can’t embed that one, but it’s cute.
But the UK’s got nothing on US. Here’s the story from yesterday. A juvy sea lion with an attitude was captured in Newport Beach, California, after attempting to pirate a boat, terrorizing children, and refusing to leave the dock.
The sea lion was captured by the Orange County Sheriff’s Harbor Patrol, maneuvered into the fireboat, but it apparently evaded the crew and took the emergency helm in a last ditch effort to humiliate his human captors. Turned on the sirens, honked the horn, put the vessel in reverse and cranked the throttle to full speed. [Full story here.]
Finally, there’s this, crossposted at Amy Oops:
Lessee, they’ve now got it turned up to 62, 66 & 61 respectively. I had to look at it, so now its you’re turn. Note that the one on the right is also the 5th Baron Haden-Guest, and is still married to Jamie Lee Curtis. [Spinal Tap ReOnion pic from here.]
Tacky Raccoons 
