28 MARCH 8:30PM – PARTY LIKE IT’S 2009

Earth HourLet’s celebrate!

At 8:30PM tonight, make sure you turn all your lights on, power up your TVs and stereos, and celebrate the Technological Achievements of Humanity.  Get in your cars and drive somewhere, just for the sake of it, and just for fun.  Raise and lower your garage doors, and run your washing machines.  Run the dryer without anything in it.  Got a power mower? Crank it up.  Heat up your cat’s food  in the microwave.  Take your dog out to Burger King.  Make as many long distance telephone calls as you can.  Run your dishwasher with half of the normal load, and run the other half separately.  Open up your refrigerator door, and look without removing anything to eat.  Do it again.  Download updates for all your computer programs and email them to all your friends.

LET’S CELEBRATE AMAZING ACHIEVEMENTS FOR A CHANGE!

“But why should I do that?” you ask.  I’ll tell you.

We’re fighting Global Cooling.  Mostly we’re fighting Global Idiocy, but let’s call it Global Cooling for now.  The feel-good crowd will never know the difference anyway.

Those folks who think that turning their electricity off for an hour will “save the planet” (or “send a message” to someone or something) are the same folks who stood outside their homes a couple of years ago with candle wax dripping over their fingers, believing that the space shuttle was gonna zoom by and take a photo of the earth lit up with peace candles.  My message is:

PUT YOUR LIGHTS ON!

HOT NEWS FLASH: Global Warming Was Stopped In Its Slimy Little Tracks in 1998

global-warming-protest_halbot-mail-090207

Washington D.C. (Strutts News Services) – Global warming came to a screeching halt for the sweaty huddling masses that converged upon our nation’s capitol on Wednesday, 4 March 2009 (ironically a day after Microsoft issued its Service Pack 3 update that froze the computers here at TR HQ).

According to one source found via Drudge:

“Global warming activists stormed Washington Monday for what was billed as the nation’s largest act of civil disobedience to fight climate change — only to see the nation’s capital virtually shut down by a major winter storm.

Schools and businesses were shuttered, lawmakers cancelled numerous appearances and the city came to a virtual standstill as Washington was blasted with its heaviest snowfall of the winter.

It spelled about six inches of trouble for global warming activists who had hoped to swarm the Capitol by the thousands in an effort to force the government to close the Capitol Power Plant, which heats and cools a number of government buildings, including the Supreme Court and the Capitol.

The snowy scene, with temperatures in the mid-20s, was reminiscent of a day in January 2004, when Al Gore made a major address on global warming in New York — on one of the coldest days in the city’s history.

Protest organizers said about 2,500 people braved the blizzard to oppose greenhouse gas emissions, but the shroud of snow wasn’t the only wet blanket in the nation’s capital Monday.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, who called on the architect of the Capitol to stop burning coal at the power plant last week, cancelled her appearance at the rally because her flight to Washington was cancelled.

Michelle Obama canned a public “Read Across America” event and HUD Secretary Shaun Donovan canceled a meeting with the Democratic Caucus because the members of Congress couldn’t get to D.C. An honor cordon at the Pentagon for Afghanistan’s defense minister also had to be called off.

Some protesters couldn’t make it as dozens of flights in the area were delayed or called off, and some couldn’t face the dangerous roads or blustery weather, leaving hundreds safe, if sorry, back at home.”

Let’s sum this up:

Due to the freezing temperatures, civil disobediancers could not be civilly disobedient;  Vandals weren’t able to vandalize the HVAC systems serving many buildings employing thousands of people; Members of congress suddenly became invisible; Nancy Pelosi thinks the Architect of the Capitol shovels coal; Michelle Obama couldn’t read due to the cold; HUD couldn’t formulate more plans for taxpayer-funded housing, and Afganistan’s defense minister is all humpy because he was snubbed.

Meanwhile Al Gore reluctantly admitted that meteorologists and other climate scientists are not credible on the topic of global warming, as none of the nay-sayers have government research funding, and none have served as vice president in any country, province or protectorate.

Pheew.

[Image from here. Related globaloids and stuff here.]

Cell Phones Cause Global Warming

[Source.]

Ethanol. What a Concept.

If Al Gore and the Global Warming Buffoons Alarmists Useful Idiots have their way, this may be all the corn you get tomorrow for the price of an ear today.

Here’s an excellent discussion on the environMENTAL movement, from a show appropriately titled “B.S.” hosted by Penn & Teller.  The video is broken up in segments on the UToobage, but LGF has THIS LINK to the show so you can view it in one clip.

CAUTION: PG-10 SCHOOLYARD LANGUAGE. The video is entertaining, no matter which side of the issue you might be on, but it’s a must see.

[Image here, via GrowABrain.  Kinda sorta related posts here, here, here, and here.]

Humor-Blogs.com

How to Create “Man-Made” Global Warming

temperature-data-collection-station.jpg

Step 1: Get a weather data station.

Step 2: Verify that it accurately records temperatures in the immediate vicinity.

Step 3: Locate it in an area that will drastically skew the temperature readings.

Step 4: Burn your trash in a nearby incinerator and laugh and laugh and laugh while polluting the atmosphere. (For more fun, locate it near an airconditioning compressor and/or clothes dryer vent, and make sure your barbeque grille is close, too.)

Step 5: Transmit the data collected to advocates of the “man-made” Global Warming theory.

Step 6: Deny any and all data anomalies.

Step 7: Apply for a government (i.e., taxpayer-funded) grant and get paid for further study.

[Originally saw this photo in a report on global warming fallacies, written by a girl in Junior High School. She surveyed weather data collectors in her area and found that a large number were set up in odd locations, like asphalt parking lots, adjacent to exhaust fans, etc. I cannot find the original story/link, so if any readers can help, I’ll post it here with credit.]

Global Warming: It’s a Good Thing

https://web.archive.org/web/20111113053411/https://tackyraccoons.com/2007/09/24/global-warming-its-a-good-thing/