The perils of being a child star while saddled with an unfortunate nickname ultimately takes its toll…
[Found in here.]
Category: Stupid
15 September is Wash Your Hedgehog Day
The procedure is obvious. First, get a Sharpie Pen and make lame pretend tattoos on your left forearm. Then, put two tablespoons of baking soda in a half-cup of warm water. Find a juvenile hedgehog, and instruct the little rascal about the importance of personal hygiene using your roommate’s toothbrush. (Don’t tell yer homedawg until the photo is posted all over the internest).
Blow-dry your hog on low setting and Enjoy.
Princess Leia Onnerbacka
She really was a slacker. According to Han Solo, she had calluses on her scapulae. Watch where you point that thing, Princess.
[Found here.]
Babe Magnet: Die KlinkerKar
Very little needs to be said about this brickbat mobile that isn’t intuitively obvious to the casual observer, except that the roof screams for asphalt shingles and vinyl gutters. Aluminum sliding windows would have been a nice touch. No need for a carwash either, as a vinegar solution with a wire brush should keep the efflorescence in check for months. Pure efficient genius. We’ll even give him credit and kudos for the keystones.
Although he’ll never get a girlfriend built like a brick youknowwhat, at least Mr. Mason knows how to perpendicular park.
[Found here.]
More Great Gift Ideas (and some are Assorted!)
Wow. I’ve been looking for a dozen assorted Inflatable Snake Swords for years, if only to have a crazy sword fight. If you swing one ISS and miss, the snakehead homes in on and bites your enemy right in the crackerbockles before deflating. Ouch. Crazy.
On the other hand, these Light-Up Expando Swords come with a built-in choking hazard. Swing one at your enemy and it breaks up into little weaponettes that fly screaming right down his/her/its throat. These weapons of mass illumination go for $14.99/dozen, so maybe they’re better for self defense after all, but they’re definitely not assorted.
Foam Swords + Duct Tape are an entirely different class of weaponry, to be covered in a future post. Meanwhile, don’t mess with ANYONE who displays little cows with crescent moons on his/her foam sword sheath. These people are dangerous, and THEY play for keeps.
Meet my next-door neighbor.
[Original image found here.]
“Oh! Look everyone!”
Some Be Hatin’ on my Babe Magnet.
Wow. Somebody put a lot of thought and effort into magnetizing this 2006 Chevy Impotent while at the same time cleverly advertising his lack of graphic talent. So let’s break it down.
The windshield motto indicates that the owner of this beauty, Tyrone, has a prison record and we taxpayers certainly paid for his incarceration “All Day.”
It’s also intuitively obvious to the casual observer that he reads Playboy for the advertisements. The symbolism behind four pairs of red dice and the dollar signs suggests that Tyrone fancies himself a gambler, and he patronizes crimson casinos exclusively.
The front bumper indicates that at least two or more people hate him, and they’re all ex-girlfriends that he borrowed money from to recoup his lost wagers/wages. I’ll bet it had something to do with his jail time.
The dashboard is carefully upholstered with a tailored moving blanket, and we can safely assume that the rest of the interior is similarly furnished. Pure efficient genius.
Then there’s the “Jesus” plate that makes it all seem better. Whatta ride.
30(NOM) = This
[Found in this collection of NOMs]
Tacky Raccoons 
