No, folks, Bunky doesn’t know what it means either, but anyone with a wallpaper design for sale titled “Tuffy and the Imaginary Flying Cat Head” gets my immediate respect. Rory Skagan’s site has many more products that are Fun to Buy – Cool to Own, so stock up now while supplies last.
[Hat tip to G-off, who lives in a P.O. Box in Colorado. He sent us this as a Christmas card.]
This works, as long as the shovels weren’t first used for latrine duty.
Reminds me of hubcap grilles, clothes hanger toast, fish poached in a dishwasher, grilled cheese sandwiches ala steam iron, foil-wrapped stew on the exhaust manifold, BeanieWeenies-in-the-can on a hot plate, electric dryer bacon. (Okay, I made up the last one.)
I’ll have our crack team of webminers find links for the above concoctions asap (unless any of you wanna beat me to it in the comments section).
Established over 50 years or not, I want the “Non-Traditional” kind with my peanut butter. Who is this Bradley guy that thinks this is food? After 50 years, you’d think he’d know better.
“WAIT MARGIE, THEY’RE READY TO EAT! FORGET THE TURKEY! WE GOT EELS! AND THEY’RE THE TRADITIONAL STYLE!”
[Photo from Liver.]
UPDATE: One of our crack webminers here at TR bleated apologies for not informing me that the Jellied Eels photo is NOT photoshopped, and that the treats are considered a delicacy in parts of London. The exact same photo, with description, can be found here. (Bunk sincerely apologizes to Mr. Bradley for thinking he was a closet Japanese foodmaker, and to all Japanese readers for thinking that you would stoop so low as to eat jellied eels. Bunk forwarded his documentation to Steve, an authority on matters like this.)
… you better have a good reason and know what you’re doing.
If you stupidly decide to mess with a Veteran, understand that Veterans each have at least one can within arm’s reach at all times, and they all know how to use it. Comes with experience.
For everyone else, you can create your own can labels here. Give a can of Whoop-Ass to someone who’s earned it.
Forget orange juice and Cap’n Crunch for breakfast. From now on it’s eggs and Diet Coke for me. (I hear that sales are down in Iran.)
[Photo via Chiquiworld.]
The original “Shout” by the Isley Brothers of Blue Ash, Ohio, limp-sinking in 1959:
Then white people in the recording industry decided to like it. Joey Dee & the Starlighters had a minor hit with it in 1962. Here’s the Shangri-las’ version, from 1963(?). No wonder it didn’t make the charts:
Then it was resurrected by Otis Day & the Knights, from National Lampoon’s “Animal House” in 1978.
As a bonus, here’s your favorite “Animal House” scene:
Thanks for watching. See you back here tomorrow.
I found this funny and somewhat disturbing at the same time. Hadda post it.
Just in time for All Soul’s Day.
Yes, folks, we’ve all seen it on TV, the one and only “Miraculously Pepper-Minty Faith-Enhancing Breathspray.”
Made from habanero chili oil, all it takes is one little squirt into your mouth, and you’ll be yelling, “OH GOD! O MY GOD!” and praying that there’s some milk left in the fridge.
—————-
Habanero chilis make you smarter.
I’d read about them. A friend had given me five little orange ones he’d grown himself. Something that small and pretty couldn’t be that bad, I told myself, and I dared myself to try one, or rather, a small part of one, and I ate a fingernail-sized slice late one night several years ago.
I have a deep and profound respect for the habanero.
It was sweet, pleasant at first, until it jumped up and filled my entire field of vision. Flaming sweat was spitting out of my forehead when I took a lick of salt (one remedy) and I jammed my fist into the refrigerator for the quart of milk without opening the door. “OH GOD!” I yanked the milk out by its udders ignoring the jagged metal that cut my forearm.
I drank the whole quart, and finally the pain subsided. Whew… at least I could say that I’d eaten the habanero. But I found out that it wasn’t done with me yet.
Relieved, and with natural endorphins jumping around in my brain, I headed for bed, got my night-chonis on, brushed my teeth. Then I took out my contacts. “OH, GOD!” A minute amount of the habanero oil had not washed off of my fingers, and now my eyes were shooting flames.
I took the contact lenses, washed them thoroughly, dumped them into the little canister with the magic cleaning tablets, and went to bed.
Next morning. Forgot about the habaneros. Fetched my contacts from the little canister. Put them in my eyes. “OH, GOD!” I decided to ride it out, and it subsided, leaving me red eyed.
And I learned that the habenero wasn’t done with me yet. Later that afternoon while sitting next to the bathtub… “OH, GOD.”
—————–
True Story, and I learned from it. Hope you did too.
[Photo source: Chiquiworld.]
Paris, Hilton (Strutts News Services) – The Cheetos sculpture featured here a coupla days ago has since been dismantled, piece-by-piece by an expert team of engineers (above).
Each and every Cheeto of the sculpture was carefully numbered, and its position in the sculpture was meticulously recorded, in order to transport and reassemble it in other artistic venues.
Unfortunately, five members of UCHU Local 21 (United Cheetos Handlers Union) disassembled the entire sculpture within 45 minutes, but neglected to preserve the integrity of the inch-long building blocks.
UCHU spokesman Dion DiMucci of Belmont (2nd from right in back) stated, “We were hired to dismantle it. Nothing in our contract said we couldn’t chew it down.”
Now for the weather: Scattered litigation, with payoffs, is expected.
[Photo via MiniatureBrainwave.]
[UPDATE: Feast of Palmer has a link to a “Rubber Biscuit” post-cursor, Sherriff & the Ravel’s “Shombolar” of 1959. Surprisingly similar… or not.]
In 1956, The Chips recorded “Rubber Biscuit” on the Josie label. An original copy of this 45rpm gem should fetch $100 plus today.
Then came The Blues Brothers. Dan Akroyd, aka “Elwood Blues,” did a fine rendition, very close to the original Chips version. He kicks it at 2 minutes into the video. If you are already familiar with this icon of American popular music, here are the lyrics as the Chips did it; otherwise, come back up here and practice after the song has burned another small greenish brown spot in the section of your brain labeled “Optional.”
RUBBER BISCUIT
The Chips: Nathaniel Epps, Charles “Kenrod” Johnson, Shedrick Lincoln, Samuel Strain Jr., Paul Fulton.
1956 Josie Records 803
Cow cow hoo-oo
Cow cow hoo-oo
Cow cow wanna dib-a-doo
Chick’n hon-a-chick-a-chick hole-a-hubba
Hell fried chuck-a-lucka wanna jubba
Hi-low ‘n-ay wanna dubba hubba
Day down sum wanna jigga-wah
Dell rown ay wanna lubba hubba
Mull an a mound chicka lubba hubba
Fay down ah wanna dip-a-zip-a-dip-a
Mm-mh, do that again!
Doo doo boooh
Cow cow lubba ‘n a-blubba lubba
Ow rown hibb’n ‘n a-hibba-lu
How low lubbin ‘n a-blubba-lubba
Hell ride ricky ticky hubba lubba
Dull ow de moun’ chicky hubba lubba
Wen down trucka lucka wanna do-uh
How low a zippin ‘n a-hubba-lu
Hell ride ricky ticky blubba-lu
Hell-o duh woody woody pecker pecker
Mm-mh, did you ever hear
of a wish sandwich?
Well that’s the kind of a sandwich
that is supposed to take
two pieces of bread
and wish you had some meat
Doo doo boooh
Cow cow lubba ‘n a-blubba lubba
Hell ride hibbin’ and zippin ‘n
How luva mail take a-lubba hubba
Hey ride wanna tak’ a-recca recca
Ho’ low take a-lubba hubba
Hey ride wanna ‘n suppa suppa
Ho’ low a mail take a-lubba hubba
Hey ride a hippin’ and a-hubbin’ no
Hi-low ‘n sum a-chicka whaa
The other day,
I ate a ricochet biscuit.
Well that’s the kind of biscuit that’s supposed to
bounce off the wall
back in your mouth.
If it don’t bounce back
– shh-mmhh-mmhh
You go hungry!
Doo doo boooh
Cow cow lubba ‘n a-blubba lubba
Hell low a sum did a-lubba goin’
Hey ride wan’ take a-lubba do
How long lon’ suppa dubba
How low a mail take a-lubba hubba
Hey ride wanna take a-lubba hubba
How low a mail take a-lubba hubba
Hey down nothin’ take a-luva do
Hey ride a sippin’ and a hubba dubba
mmmmmh, the other day
I ate a cool water sandwich
and a sunday-go-to-meeting bun.
Doo doo boooh
Cow cow lubba ‘n a-blubba lubba
Hell ride ricky ticky hubba lubba
How low a wann’ suppa do
Hey ride sippin’ and hubba lubba
Hell ride a-hubbin’ and wan’ do
Hey ride a wanna an’ recca recca
Ho’ low a mail take lubba hubba
Hey down a wann’ suppa dubba
Please ride a hubbin’ gonn’ do
What you want for nothin’
r-r-r-Rubber Biscuit!
Doo doo doo boooh
Cooow cooow oo-oooooouuuh
Review the lyrics and print ’em out so the whole family can sing along. Tough one-chord song to sing, and you won’t find the words anywhere else but here (unless you look hard elsewhere).
[Anyone who has an .mp3 file of the Chips’ original is invited to send a link, and we’ll post it and credit you here. –Bunk]
Update: THE ORIGINAL VERSION HERE!
Tacky Raccoons 