Category: Humor

J. V. Lafferty’s Contribution to the World

lucy-the-elephant-building2_amazing-building.jpg

If you lived here, you wouldn’t need to keep your old trunk in the attic. From Wikipedia:

James Vincent de Paul Lafferty, Jr. (1856-1898) was an Irish-American inventor, most famous for his construction of Lucy the Elephant. Born to Irish parents in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, he received Patent Number 268503, on December 5, 1882 to protect his original invention, as well as any animal-shaped building. Broke by 1887, he was forced to sell her and in 1898, he died, and is buried in the cemetery of St. Augustine’s Catholic Church in Philadelphia.

This architectural gem was built, still stands, and is protected as an historical something or other. [You can see Lucy in all her glory in this previous post.]

Babe Magnet: Duct Tape

babemagnet-w-ducttape_.jpg

It’s a difficult call as to whether or not this magnificent piece of machinery truly qualifies as a genuine Babe Magnet. The role of the duct tape would give it automatic induction into the realm of the BM, but this relic seems to be sitting a a few too many parking lots downstream of the Stop-N-Go store in uptown Tomball.

In other words, it just isn’t advertising itself… except for one, actually two details.

babe-magnet-duct-tape2.jpg

Yep. Rubber doorstops for the broken window regulator grant this monster machine a solid thumbs up as a genuine Babe Magnet. Pure efficient genius.

[Images from here.]

UPDATE 12 March 2008: I’m embarrassed to admit that I missed one other important detail. The seven little white things on the dashboard are either (a) Sun-bleached Easter peeps from last year; (b) Partially consumed rice balls; (c) A used Kleenex collection; or (d) Little tiny ghosts.

There may be other solutions to the mystery of the little white things. I know that some of y’all have more expertise identifying LWT’s through the windshield of a Babe Magnet than I, and I’d appreciate any suggestions so that we can put this Bunk stumper to rest.

Look Before You Eat

foodland8.jpg

Carl Warner’s work has appeared in Neatorama, via here.

Here’s Warner’s site that takes an annoyingly long time to download. Amazing photo montages of food landscapes. You rock, Carl. You’ve got all the necessary color groups covered.

[Tip ‘o the Tarboosh to Malfynk for this email.]

Gimme some Skin

skindiseases0001.jpg

Truth in Advertising

fruit-medley-1.jpg

Found this nice package lounging around on the Family Strutts Butcher Block. (The FSBB is just another flat surface where a lot of unrelated items collect.) This caught my eye last evening, and I thought, “Wow. A ‘Fruit Medley,’ and precisely 1.90 ounces of it.” So I did what any one of you would have done. I took it to the bathroom.

I stood on the bathroom scale and noted my weight (including clothing, trenchcoat, mudcaked chukka boots). Then I weighed myself again, including clothing, trenchcoat, boots, AND the package labeled “Fruit Medley,” and subtracted the difference. I found that the “Fruit Medley” weighed in at 2.046 ounces. “What a windfall,” I thought. I couldn’t wait to find out what was in the package, and without flushing, ran back out to the kitchen (after washing my hands of course). I opened the box and found this:

fruit-medley-2.jpg

Looked just like the package photo. I gotta admit that the package also says, “Our Family’s Best Since 1906,” and I imagine that a bushel of fruit from over 100 years ago might look something like it.

But that’s not the point of this post. Daughter Bunkessa showed me this:

baked-bread.jpg

It’s a bag of bread, labeled “Baked Bread.” Forget that it’s apparently made from wild berry flour, it’s baked bread. I’ve had the other kind, and it’s a lot like a cold bowl of Hormel chili.

But that’s not the point of this post either. While I was in the bathroom weighing the “Fruit Medley” I noticed this on the counter:

facial-cream-cleanser.jpg

Think about this. If you wash your face with facial cream, and the cream gets dirty and disgusting, what can you do? This product solves the problem.

Is this a Great Country or what?

Hot Links

blaaaat.jpg

Although Bunk would prefer that y’all stay here, sometimes it’s necessary to open the door a crack and let ch’all go out and play. Just be back here by midnight.
_______________________________________________

The Rock-A-Teens, 1959, “WooHoo” here.

The 5678’s “WooHoo” here.

Clever advertising here.

Photos found at a swap meet of an unknown family who probably owned a liquor store here.

Coffee, oddness and live podcasts at Rockhoppers. Get wired and laid back at the same time.

I don’t know why you’d want to do it, but if you have to, here are step-by-step instructions on how to “Purple Wash” your dolls.

I reuse my calendars. mini-contest-best-short-joke.

Some websites are updated every 60 seconds. One of them can be found here.

Funky time wasters here and here.

The Museum of Scientifically Accurate Fabric Brain Art here.

Speaking of Fabric Brain Art, check out Clay Pigeon. Kinda like the Onion, only better.

A very addictive time waster here. (I gave up after level 16.)

How many of States in the USA have you been to? Give your answers here and it’ll show you a map of them in case you forgot where they were.

Tuscan Whole Milk 1 gallon 128 fl. oz. is still available at Amazon, with over 900 great customer reviews. (Caution: If you read the reviews while drinking a tall cold glass of it, Tuscan Whole Milk will come out your nose.)

Much absurdity may be found here from Bunk’s previous life as a stray poster for SNTC. In those days Bunk only posted once every coupla weeks or so, before he jumped face-first into the blogpool with Tacky Raccoons.

TGIF: The .gif Friday Post 27 – Multi Lock On

wwcfvwrdph3xzppp2k.jpg

No idea what this is all about (maybe something about fighting global warming caused by the sun). Nice animation just the same.  Rock on.

[Source somewhere in here. Tip ‘o the Tarboosh to Dan.]

Incomplete Twinning

incomplete-twinning_vvork_080222.jpg

This is a Maraca, to train schizophrenics with rhythm to cooperate with his- or herself without fighting. Or not.  [Image from somewhere in here.]

But then, there’s also this incomplete twinning.  [Growabrain is looking for the source.]

odd_2008_fight_growabrain.gif

R2D2 Beta Version ca. 1871

r1d0-gadgetcon080224.jpg

Some images are just too cool to caption, but so what.

R2D2 [steam powered beta version] was a mechanical dork even back then. “Tweep Pleeeert REEEP,” means only one thing in droidland, and it’s not nice.

[Image from GadgetConcierge. Related posts here and here.]

It’s National Wash Your Cephalopod Day

hidako_1_pink-tentacle080124.jpg

Springtime is here, or almost is, and something about this photo fascinates and disgusts me at the same time, kinda like goth/emo laundry. I’m not sure if these are squid or octopi, but either way something just isn’t right. Obviously they’re being dried for either food or rain gear, but these sentient denizens of the deep don’t deserve to be humiliated like this.

This image has been lounging around in our “What to Do With This” file for a long time, way before we began tagging the images with their sources. We’d be happy to post the real story if only our crack team of webminers could determine the original source. Comments?

[Welcome Ectoplasmosis readers! If you liked these octopi, you might like the RoboSquid. Feel free to crawl slither hydropropel yourselves around here as long as you want. Just leave a trail of bread crumbs slime crab shells to find your way back.]

[Ditto to Tonmo & WHI readers!]

[UPDATE 22 March 08: ORIGINAL SOURCE HERE! (via here).  Our crack team of webminers just got an extension on their contracts.]