Odd – Page 498 – Tacky Raccoons

Boy, 10, Brought Home by Mothership

Basil Mills, Nebraska – (Strutts News Services)

While 10-year-old Donny Plunck played the time-tested game of “See-How-Far-You-Can-Throw-A-Rock,” trouble was brewing. Unaware that he’d been tracked down by a larger and more intelligent force, he suddenly found himself airborne, and was transported back to his home over a mile away, by his left wrist.

Donny recalled the ordeal vividly. “It was a frightening eerie silence, all the way home, except for the wind.”

He was levitated all the way to his bedroom door when he heard a booming voice from above: “I TOLD you to clean your room! Now DO IT before your FATHERSHIP comes home!”

Donny was not harmed in any way, and his room was spotless by 5:23PM.

Photo via Neatorama. Sort of.

“What’d you say?”

(Photo & caption blatantly lifted from Mattress Police in May ’07, and entirely without Diesel’s permission. I’ll give ’em back when I’m done.)

Inexpensive Chandelier

Just think… without shadows, we couldn’t see anything. Otherwise, just think. Or not.

Photo via Design Corner.

ZIGGY DEAD AT 36

Ft. Lauderdale, FL – (Strutts News Services)
Beloved cartoon character “Ziggy” succumbed to a heat stroke on Thursday, when record temperatures caused an overload in the local power grid, shutting down the air conditioning in Mr. Z’s beach front condo. He was found unconscious and unresponsive by Lt. Commander Lannie Foosers of the Ft. Lauderdale Health and Rescue Division, and was pronounced dead on arrival at Holy Cross Hospital.

“Ziggy was a good guy, a guy you could trust,” sobbed neighbor and close friend, Ms. Janessa Vapors. “He wouldn’t not do nothin’ to not harm a flea, and now he’s gone. He’d trip over my sprinkler hose and get soaked at least once a week.”

“He always looked kinda waxy,” commented Mr. Bob Bieber, Ziggy’s groundskeeper. “He never looked like he had pants on, but his dog was okay.”

From Toonopedia: “His supporting cast includes a dog, Fuzz, whose main function is to echo and amplify Ziggy’s actions; a cat, Sid, who is afraid of mice; a parrot, Josh, who seldom has anything encouraging to say; a duck, Wack; and a fish, Goldie. These are augmented by an endless stream of auto mechanics, department store clerks, fortune tellers, psychoanalists, waitresses, etc., none of whom do much to brighten his life. He does not have a girlfriend.”

(Photo: Ziggy and Fuzz in happier days)

Rest in Peace, Zigman. We’ll miss you.

Wavy Gravy Lives!

George Carlin, and later Cheech y Chong, were arguably the first hippie comedians, although an argument could be made that all hippies were comedians. At least these guys were intentionally funny.

But Wavy Gravy owns the title of being the First Hippie Clown. He even played Woodstock, and he’s still alive.

Proof can be found on the Wavy Gravy Homepage.

Summertime in London

Check on him in the fall. Find out how cold the winter’s gonna be.
Photo snatched from here.

I Don’t Wanna Grow Up

Classic Ramones song, “I Don’t Wanna Grow Up,” as performed by Tom Waits:

Classic Tom Waits song, “I Don’t Wanna Grow Up,” as performed by the Ramones:

If I had to pick the only song that I was allowed to listen to for the rest of my life, this wouldn’t be it. Both versions might make my top 500, though.

P.S. Tom Waits wrote it.

[1st link via LGF. ]

Here’s Where We Left Off…

From Yesterday’s episode:

“‘How do I do it?’ I get the kids to do it. They made the mess in the first place. Get up off the floor, honey, and bring me a beer.”

“Thanks, Hon! I thought we were out!”

“No, dear. Don and Betty just arrived and they brought refreshments.”

“Well look who else showed up! It’s Olivia and Harry!”

“What did Harry bring, dear?”

“Uh, a bottle opener… with soda. Did you tell the kids to clean the bathroom?”

“I thought Rick and Bob were coming.”

“They’re out by the community pool, discussing very important issues of the day, and dinosaurs. They should be here soon.”

“Don’t worry about them, Dave! We gotcha covered! What’s that racket?!”

“It’s Brenda from the next trailer over. Let her play it a couple of times, tell her how much you like it, and she’ll stop.”

“Brenda! Is that you? How are you! I need to replace the needle on the phonograph so it doesn’t damage your record. Meanwhile, have a beer!”

“Honey, where are the kids?”

“Cleaning the bathroom, dear, like you asked.”

[Apparently, Ted and Sally found Mommy’s anti-stress medicine and were out for the rest of the evening.]

“Hey everybody! Supper’s almost ready, but I forgot to fillet the fish! Let’s have another round!”

“Harry, you’re such a spaz.”

“Nothing like fish with a good ale I always say.”

“Aw, B.S. Dave. You never say that. Where’s Rick?”

“Right behind you, John! How ’bout a little after-dinner apertif? Where’s Dan? He was supposed to have dessert ready by now.”

“Dan? Oh Da-a-an! Where’d he wander off to this time?…”

[Epilogue: At 7:43 pm, a fist fight erupted over the ruined dessert. 8:25pm the camera crew from COPS arrived. By 9:06pm police had shut down the party, and incarcerated the residents of the entire trailer park, excepting, of course, Ted and Sally who were still navigating multiple dimensions of existence and couldn’t be detected readily.

Everyone lived happily ever after, even though they never spoke to one another again.]

All illustrations above are from the excellent archives of Plan59.

Heterochromia Catlights

This feline is possessed… with Heterochromia. Two different colored eyes, the sign of a Bruja. Don’t mess with it.

In my case, though, soy un Brujo. Dangerous to mess with Bunk, also.

Glitching out the Ferrets

Hadda spooler crash yesterday, prolly due to the heat, and we’re in the process of doctoring it. Meanwhile, here’s something to look at.

No, I don’t have her phone number. But ya gotta admit that she looks good in sepia. With muddy bunny ears. And beads. And, wait, there’s something about her teeth…