Category: Uncategorized

Which is more offensive?

THIS:

“The shocking image shows top female tennis players making “slit-eyed” gestures, and was found on the official website of the country’s Spanish Tennis Federation – RFET. The latest group are seen pulling back the skin at their temples to give a slit-eyed look, alongside the caption: “Estamos preparados para China” (we are prepared for China).”

[Top image with asinine caption from here.]

OR THIS:

“Tiananmen Square [1989] This is the picture of a student/man going to work who has just had enough. The days leading up to this event thousands of protesters and innocent by standers were killed by their own government because the Chinese people wanted more rights. He tries to stop the tanks in Tiananmen Square by standing in front of them and climbed on the tank and hitting the hatch and yelling, the tank driver didn’t crush the man with the bags as a group of unknown people came and dragged him away, we still don’t know if the man is alive or dead as the Chinese government executed many of the protesters involved. China is still controlled by a communist regime, but while there are strong willed men like this the country still has hope.”

[Bottom image and caption from here. Heavily sanitized version here.]

Saturday Matinee: When Day Breaks

Cool animation.

Talking Heads:  Wild Wild Life

The Ramones:  Sheena Is a Punk Rocker

Tom Waits:  Downtown Train

And now for our Feature Presentation:
ATTACK OF THE KILLER PARASITES!

[Tip o’ the tarboosh to the entirely bitchin’ Miss Cellanea.]

Humpy-Blogs.com

Rear Exit No.2

“Daddy!  Daddy!  Were you watching?  I’m an elephant poop!  Watch me! I’m gonna be a BIG elephant poop!  Watch me!”

Climbing up into its butt and being elephant vomit just can’t be nearly as much fun.

[Image from here.  Related post here (and for his birfday,  Phil gets a free pass through the pachyderm, in the direction of his choice).]

Humor-Blugs.com

Saturday Matinee – Sneakers

Rock n’ Roll Spy Dudeness:  Johnny Rivers’ Secret Asian Man.

Here are a few others you may or may not recobanize:

Paranoia on free broadcast analog TV.  The intro to “The Prisoner” starring Patrick McGoohan was the best of the best.  Explained everything you needed to know to understand this excellent series… sorta.

Heavy Weather Station

Although this was found on a Russian website, it came with this attached description:

The Tornado Intercept Vehicle just east of Kearney, NE, on I-80, May 29, 2008. The TIV is a vehicle specifically designed for storm chaser Sean Casey and follows Josh Wurman’s Project Rotate radar crew, currently being filmed for a documentary by the Discovery Channel.

[Image from here via here.]

Kirk vs. T vs. Norris: Battle of the Titans (Part 3)

Chuck. You don’t even have to say his last name before he roundhouse kicks you for even thinking that he might be not be invincible. Chuck vs. Jim vs. Mr. is an awesome conundrum, mainly because all three are good guys who wouldn’t be pounding each other down for the count. They’d join forces and pound ME down for even suggesting such an absurdity. They would, but they won’t. They’re good guys, just like me.

IF there was a three-way match up between Captain Kirk, Mr. T, and Chuck Norris, CN has a definite edge.

Firstly, he’s got all THE FACTS on his side. THE FACTS are a formidable weapon by themselves, and basically negate any argument regarding the possibility of Norris being somewhat inferior to Kirk and T.

Secondly, he’s still got all THE FACTS. No argument.

Thirdly, all THE FACTS are true.

Looks to me like Chuck Norris wins the tournament, as he’s standing right behind me as I post thIN NO WAY COULD CAPTAIN KIRK OR MR. T BEAT ME EITHER INDIVIDUALLY OR IN A TWO-ON-ONE MATCH SIGNED CHUCK NORRIS. TYPE IT AND POST IT. NOW. GET AWAY FROM YOUR KEYBOARD. I’LL HIT SEND.

[Related posts here and here. Related archive here.]

Kirk vs. T vs. Norris: Battle of the Titans (Part 2)

Mr. T., heh. There’s no one quite like the T-man, but that’s not what this post is about. It’s about whether or not he could take out Captain Kirk and Chuck Norris. Tough assignment, to be sure.

T’s strong points:

He don’ take no jibba-jabba from no foo. Kirk takes jibba-jabba from foos, and so does Norris. No one really knows what Mr. T does with that jibba-jabba, and since he don’t take none, my guess is he be give it back right away.

Secondly, he’s got little South Vietnamese flags stitched into his denim vest thingy. Neither Jim nor Chuck could pull that off without embarrassing criticism.

3rd advantage: Mr. T has more merchandise on the market than Kirk and Norris combined. (To keep this a fair competirion, generic “Star Trek” stuff doesn’t count. Has to be Captain Kirk paraphernalia.) There is so much T stuff that I can’t name them all, as they include cartoons, “T” shirts, posters, metal lunch boxes, crayons, cookie jars, bathtub toys, breakfast cereal, toothpaste, socks, underwear, baby spoons, floor wax and snow tires.

Yeah, I know he can punch sharks, but so could Fonzi. Cheez.

Strong suit: Well, HE IS MR. T. He’s got serious in-your-face attitude, and could conceivably turn it up to 11 when facing Kirk or Norris, and get them to back down without throwing a punch.

Mr. T is clearly the winner in the merchandise category. He’s got the wire brush mohawk going for him, and he’s got the foos (Kirk and Norris) seriously pitied.

Because of these strong points, Mr. T is a top-notch candidate for the Big ‘Ol Gold Belt.

[Related posts here and here. Related archive here. Coming up tomorrow: Chuck Norris.]

Black Balled

Nope, it’s not an art project. The video from the LA Times kinda sorta explains it… In any case, 400,000 black balls are saving the planet or something.

[Image from here.]

Vodpod videos no longer available.

[Just a reminder: Tomorrow, 17 June 2008 – Firefox Guinness Book of World Records Download! Pass it on!]

Babe Magnet: The Spoiler

Well, well, well. What do we have here?

Looks like it’s time for the Dorkville Senior Prom, and someone’s dad brought home some scrap plywood and 1×6 roof sheathing from the jobsite again. He snagged an aerosol can of expansive foam insulation as well. The same someone’s mom scored some water color poster paint from the art supply room at Dorkville Elementary while Mrs. DeFarcas was busy washing the wheat paste off of Bobby Bieber’s face. Who could that someone be?

Trey Johnson. He’s that little s.o.b. from down the street that tried to let air out of your tires and only managed to release a half-pound before his fingernail ripped when you hit him with the garden hose on Halloween night a coupla years back. Now he’s a junior at Dorkville High, and he owns a staple gun. He tried to flatten your spare with it just last week.

Not much I can say that’s not intuitively obvious to the casual observer, except that TJ really screwed up the fit of the trunk and had to replace both rear light assemblies (you can’t chip away that foam insulation without damage) and got no dates for his trouble. Even the Dorkville Cheerleaders laughed at him.

Yet another great Babe Magnet. Pure efficient genius.

[Image from here.]