Category: Gift Ideas

Another Great Gift Idea: Cordless Battery Charger

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[Image from here.]

Another Great Gift Idea: Sick Japanese Dog With Infectious Saliva Game!

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Okay, um, lessee.  You open the sickly dog’s skull, stick his tongue to the roof of his mouth and pour in a bunch of green slime with little tidbits in it.  Now the sinuses are loaded. Close the head, and doggy drools infected pus with candies that you try to retrieve with electrified tweezers before they land on his tongue.

But here’s the excellent twist:  If you pick the wrong tidbit, you are awarded with 110V of Japanese current coursing through your metacarpals.  Hilarity ensues as you roll on the floor convulsing uncontrollably.  Everyone’s a loser in this game, not just you!

It still doesn’t beat “Pie Face” as our all-time favorite strategy game, but it’s a close second.

[Found at RGS, with many more to choose from. Nice archive of gifts here.]

Hot Christmas

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[Crappy Christmas Album Covers from Amy Oops. But beware of Charlie the Hamster downloads… Firefox says they gots malware attachments.]

Another Great Gift Idea: Kawaba!

What a great toy!  Man-o-man this sends me back.  What 9-year-old boy could resist a wooly mammoth with wings and don’t-eat-the-yellow-snow tusks, with a pair of, um, snow-covered cookies growing out of its trunk.  Japanese marketing is amazing.

The folks from Nippon are amused by us westerners as well.  If you ever find yourself among a group of them, all you have to say is “Detroit” and they double over laughing.

Careful with the Kawaba site on the advert above; might not be safe according to Firefox.

[Update:  Try this Kawaba site instead: http://www.kawaba.co.jp/index.php ]

[Image from the Awesome Cheese.]

I WANT THIS.

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In daylight it just screams “Outta My Way, Butthead!”

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But at night, it whispers, “Vaporizer Ignition Sequence Activated.
T minus ten and counting…”

“Check it out at night. This baby can be driven from a seated or standing position, fully envelops five in an interior that’s cozily lit and decoratively carpeted, has a premium sound system, and a centrifugal clutch. Then there’s the external rust patina—better call Maaco right now, because next year this color’s going to be impossible to obtain. Oh, right…not licensed for use on public roads, and the whopping price tag does not include shipping and handling. It’s going to take a lot of handling to get this to your place. On the other hand, it could become your place with just a few minor alterations.”

Before I order it, I need to verify if the water cannon is included or if it’s an after market add-on.  I still want it for neighborhood protection.  Couldn’t verify the size of the cooler either, but I understand that the hologram projector is a standard option.

[Images and italicized description from here.  Buy it for me, here.]

Another Great Gift Idea: Etch-A-Line

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Bryan, OH (Strutts News Services) – Etch-A-Line-X from Ohio Art promises to be a big seller this season, second only to Etch-A-Dot.  This excellent version allows children with Y-Y comprehension problems to ignore the difficulties inherent in the original product. Etch-A-Line-Y, the companion toy, allows children to explore the Y-Y axis by scrolling the “etch” vertically on the screen, i.e., up and down.

For those children who might be uncomfortable with two dimensions, Ohio Art has the Etch-A-Dot, which cleverly replaces the non-user-friendly single rolling knob with a red “Press This Button” activation device.  Press the Red Button, and you’ve got a dot.  The “Dot” provides instant gratification, a minimalist work of art, and it’s clever as well, since the “dot” is ALWAYS at the precise center of the screen.

What the Future Holds:  Production of the fourth companion product, (Etch-A-Line-Z) is on hold for now.  Preliminary evaluations resulted in the temporary blindness of a substantial number of volunteers. Prototype Z is being re-evaluated for distribution in late August of the year after next before this one.

[From here. Nice archive of other excellent gift ideas here.]

You Might Think It’s Soap…

…but itsnot.

[I knows the image is from here.]

State of the Art, Cutting Edge, Wave of the Future, Now More Than Ever, New and Improved Coprophagia Prevention

Puppies are born with incomplete digestive systems.  They aren’t able to completely digest everything that passes through their digestive tracts.  Therefore they recycle, and pet owners can’t stand to watch that kind of natural recycling.

The Associated Press, Reuters, MSN and CNN and a couple of other media sources that come to mind are kinda like that, too, but they are not puppies and so far there are no products available to prevent them from recycling their own crap.

[Real product advert from here. I don’t know what’s worse, that or this.]

Bunk’s Money Saving Tips: How to Save Gas

Oil prices are up.  Propane prices are up.  Methane prices are going up, too, so save it for a rainy day.  Don’t keep ’em bottled up inside, collect ’em all and cash ’em in!  Register a brand name like I did (Jumpin’ Jack Flashizza™) and wait for the FartMart to open a retail outlet near you.  Then you can barter your best SBD BarnBurners in bulk and get paid for your flatulence daily, weekly, or monthly as required.

Just another Money Saving Tip for loyal readers of Tacky Raccoons.

[Image from here.  Nice find, Planetross.]

Humor-Blogs.com (and if I don’t start getting some hits from Diesel’s website I’m gonna drop the widgets.)

[UPDATE-  I think I got the link to Humor-Blogs fixed.  Try it out and get Tacky Raccoons back into the top 10%  – Bunk]

[UPDATE 2 – The link still doesn’t recobanize the post source.  (The guttural non-fricative “grrrrg” comes to mind.)]

Japanese Girl Rubber Mute

She looks like a fun girl who needs a big ‘ol honkin’ conch shell instead.  When used properly, it spits out blue three-leafed clovers.

(While you ponder that, check this out.   Capitol Records has squelched embedding classic videos like this one:

Music by the Marvelows.  Interpreted by Peter Wolf & the J. Geils Band.  Previously posted and squelched.

[Image via RGS.]