Socialism FAIL.

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Don’t worry.  The monkeys won’t starve until their providers run out of food.

[Image from here.]

Urban Hunting

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People like Mr. Beasley amaze me.  Here’s a guy who grew up in the poverty-stricken rural south who knows more about basic survival than almost anyone reading this post.  He’s carved himself a niche, trapping urban raccoons, cleaning them, and selling them to folks who enjoy this delicacy — IN DETROIT!

fresh-coons-2b“Coon or rabbit. God put them there to eat. When men get hold of animals he blows them up and then he blows up. Fill ’em so full of chemicals and steroids it ruins the people. It makes them sick. Like the pigs on the farm. They’s 3 months old and weighing 400 pounds. They’s all blowed up. And the chil’ren who eat it, they’s all blowed up. Don’t make no sense.”

–Glemie Beasley, Urban Hunter.

I don’t agree with his argument against raising corn-fed animals to butcher, but consider this:  If all of a sudden there was no food at the grocery stores and money became worthless, how would you feed your family?

You’d do it just like Glemie Beasley does it… or starve.

The video is interesting, but the “host” is a smarmy condescending dorkboy with a “soul patch” under his lower lip.

Finest point about capturing and butchering game such as possum and raccoon is to leave a paw on, so that folks can tell you’re not selling dog or cat carcasses.  The video is graphic in as much as a cooking show shows a skinned chicken;  but it also instructs on how to prepare small game carcasses.

[Full story with video here.  Related stuff:  I mentioned before that James Burke’s  Part 3 of Episode 1 of his excellent Connections series is a must see.  Be patient until 4:30- that’s where the meat is.]

OH NOES!

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TALK TO THE HAND! This is Terrible news!

[Image from here.]

FREE RAW MEAT!

That’s right, folks, FREE RAW MEAT. Visit either link below and download your own tenderloin, grilled or raw, with carrots, plate, knife and fork. And there’s prolly a link somewhere on the internest to download your own dry beaujolais to go with it.

Cool stuff coming up tomorrow and Saturday, but be back here Sunday for REAL FOOD.

[Original post here via RGS. Both have downloadable links.]


[Update: Old linkys are dead. Here are templates.]

(I Can Has Cheezburger?)

Um…

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Ah, um…

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Bunk can tolerate microwaved frozen sliders, and experienced the joys of igde pshat and the Habañero, but I have to draw the line at this canned delicacy. For now.

[Story found here. Image found via link. Original story, um, I dunno. Maybe here. In English or Spanish, it’s still wrong.]

When Apples Go Bad

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All it took to send them into rebellion was one innocuous comment.

“Hey Bob! Bob Oso! Y’all truckin’ Granny Smith again?” The Jonagolds had had enough.

[Related post here.]

Rock Candy

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Look here. Bunk knows peanut butter and banana sandwiches, and you, Reese, are no peanut butter and banana sandwich maker.

What young Bunky liked better were peanut butter and sweet pickle sandwiches, combining the flavor of Jif with the crunch of baby gerkins. And vice versa.

Fortunately, Reese acknowleged that these bastardized confections have artificial flavor, so you can rest assured that it doesn’t taste exactly like the King. They made up for the chicanery by labeling the bag, “Collector Edition,” thus snagging all the compulsive candy-collectors investors hoping to score big bucks months or years from now in the Reese’s Cups futures market.

So just how many bags do you have stashed away in your safe deposit box?

[Image from Bockety.]

Forget Turkey. This Rocks.

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Established over 50 years or not, I want the “Non-Traditional” kind with my peanut butter. Who is this Bradley guy that thinks this is food? After 50 years, you’d think he’d know better.

“WAIT MARGIE, THEY’RE READY TO EAT! FORGET THE TURKEY! WE GOT EELS! AND THEY’RE THE TRADITIONAL STYLE!”

[Photo from Liver.]

UPDATE: One of our crack webminers here at TR bleated apologies for not informing me that the Jellied Eels photo is NOT photoshopped, and that the treats are considered a delicacy in parts of London. The exact same photo, with description, can be found here. (Bunk sincerely apologizes to Mr. Bradley for thinking he was a closet Japanese foodmaker, and to all Japanese readers for thinking that you would stoop so low as to eat jellied eels. Bunk forwarded his documentation to Steve, an authority on matters like this.)

TGIF: the .gif Friday Post 10 – Tuna/Corn Hybrid

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I found this funny and somewhat disturbing at the same time. Hadda post it.

R2D2 Craps Pepper in Your Salad

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StarWars excreta. May the farce be with you.
[Source.]