How can you improve upon improvised pirate swords?
“Bobby! Let’s play pirates!” “Great idea! I’ll go get the Plastic Guards! I’ll be back in an hour!”
Clever idea, but it won’t fly. Any kid who grew up near fallen branches could tell you that swords of the windfall variety don’t last long, and once your weapon has broken you need to find a replacement fast, otherwise you’re declared dead by default. Stopping to change your guard guarantees it.
Oh, well, it’s the thought that counts, and I wish I’d thought of it first.
[Calvin Demarest demonstrates the Massé in 1912. He went schizo a few years later.]
Oh yeah. I remember my best shot. Outside of Houston. Twenties on the rail in a call the shot game, and I had spots. Two spots were sitting in adjacent corners at the end of the table, and a stripe was next to the side pocket. I was blocked for the far corner, my cueball was on the wrong side of the near pocket and against the rail, and I couldn’t bank the corner shot. What could I do?
I did what any bluffer would do. Call both corners.
With my cue in the air, I jammed a Massé shot. Put so much spin on the cue ball that it hopped the rail in front of the side pocket, rode it and spun back down to the table on the other side of the side pocket and caught the side rail. It sunk Spot 1 in the near corner, then shot down the end rail to sink Spot 2. No scratch.
Of course I had to keep a poker face, so I walked to my next shot as if nothing spectacular had happened. Within seconds everyone grabbed their money and went upstairs. Game over.
“Space is the Place” featuring the music of Herman Poole Blount, aka Sun Ra and his Arkestra. The description on that vid is, um, well you’re on you’re own:
“Sun Ra – space-age prophet, Pharaonic jester, shaman-philosopher and avant-jazz keyboardist/bandleader–lands his spaceship in Oakland, having been presumed lost in space for a few years. With Black Power on the rise, Ra disembarks and proclaims himself “the alter-destiny.” He holds a myth-vs reality rap session with vblack inner-city youth at a rec center, threatening “to chain you up and take you with me, like they did you in Africa” if they resist his plea to go to outer space. He duels at cards with The Overseer, a satanic overlord, with the fate of the black race at stake. Ra wins the right to a world concert, which features great performance footage of the Arkestra. Agents sent by the Overseer attempt to assassinate Ra, but he vanishes, rescues his people, and departs in his spaceship from the exploding planet Earth.”
Before you dismiss him as a kook, check this out. It’s from the awesome LP record “Stay Awake,” where various artists were invited to interpret their favorite Disney songs:
Now on to something completely different.
That one was suggested by Bunkessa, who said that it’s been around for a while, but “most of your peeps haven’t seen it.”
I’d forgotten all about The Steve Gibbons Band until I remembered his cover of that Chuck Berry song. Not bad rock and roll for a Brit.
Have a great weekend, folks. See you back here tomorrow.
[Update: This just came to my attention via DoD, just hadda post the video below.]
Oh, man, this is a game I’d fight to get in on. I don’t care if it was manufactured and sold by Hasbro, Milton Bradley, Ohio Art or Whammo, the pure psychological strategy of this simple game is awesome.
First step is to show up to the party early. Then get the ante to a decent level, and once the pot is there, that’s when you talk about how you practiced with the set earlier. Of course you don’t remember which color you practiced with, as you start sniffling and hacking a bit. (Complaining about a slight fever helps.) Then start the game immediately, and without hesitation, hock up a loogie into the trash can.
Gentlemen’s rules say anyone who quits forfeits the pot. INSTANT WIN!
Too bad I didn’t post this earlier, coulda saved everyone a bunch of trouble. Besides applesauce, this practical contrivance also works for mashed potatoes and tomato puree. Pure efficient genius.
[Found here.]
Lessee. A quick review of the photo tells me that these aren’t physics students, and that there is likely beer involved. At least four people thought that this was a good idea, and there’s a fifth one in the background egging them on who looks just like this.
Hefty Bathing with solar heated water is the latest trend in the hood, especially when the water’s been turned off for non-payment and you gotta drag a hose from the neighbor’s crib bibb. For a bubble bath, provide your own effervescence… and you can think that one through for yourselves.
Tacky Raccoons 