Category: Real News

The Doctor is in, but where is Ellie Light?

These are the folks who search for stuff on the internest.  These are the same folks who find Tacky Raccoons by searching for stuff on the internest.  These are the top 20 search requests over the past year that these folks used to find stuff on Tacky Raccoons. Go figger.

  1. ferret
  2. wooly bear caterpillar
  3. batmobile
  4. motivational poster
  5. woolly bear caterpillar
  6. amputee porn
  7. giant bear
  8. babe
  9. motivational
  10. mission viejo
  11. giant caterpillar
  12. dwarf porn
  13. motivational pictures
  14. steampunk
  15. woolly bear
  16. stained glass
  17. gif animations
  18. ninja cat
  19. ferret pictures
  20. pillsbury dough boy

None of this matters, aside from being a curious list, and that I’m honestly surprised that Igde Pshat didn’t show up;  not that anyone would google it, or that anyone would search for  fuldkommen gak either for that matter. We’ve got bigger ducks to fry. It kinda bothers me that neither phrase showed up in our most-wanted google list.

I’ll get over it. Meanwhile…

The big question today is, Who is Ellie Light?

[Image found here.]

[Update: Ellie Light is found.]

We Got Weather!

This waterspout off the Huntington Beach Pier came ashore and flipped an SUV last Wednesday.  The pier is about 1/2 mile from my office.

Because they’re laden with water, they’re smaller than tornados that touch down on land, but they’re still magnetically attracted to trailer parks and boat slips.

Death Row Barbie & Other Science Fair Projects

No photoshoppage here, these are the real deal. I’d give each of these students an A for Awesome.

Click on individual images below to avoid the squints. More great projects can be found here. Click on Death Row Barbie above for step-by-step instructions.

The Montgomery Story

Martin Luther King Jr. was born 15 January 1929. Its a shame that so many self-serving politicians and faux civil rights organizations have co-opted and distorted his legacy.

Click on the image to read the whole publication.

NY Apartment Infested With Cats and Reptiles: NYPD Officer Uses Drugs

Police Officer Martin Duffy rappels down the side of 2430 Adam Clayton Powell Blvd. in Harlem to shoot a 400-pound Bengal-Siberian tiger, that was kept in an apartment, with a tranquilizer. The sedated tiger, named Ming, and a 3-foot caiman alligator were removed from the building. The animals’ owner was tracked down in Philadelphia and charged with reckless endangerment.

[Image found here with description embedded. Full story from 2003 here.]

Elvis: Still Alive At 75

[Image from here. .Gif from here. Video previously posted here with awesome commentary. Long Live the King.]

NOOOOO

… so I guess we’ll never know.

[Top image found in here.]

New Year’s Day: A Safety Reminder

New Year’s Resolution Number 1: Walk Wisely.

This lifesaving message was brought to you by the National Safety Council via the 1960 Rose Parade. Better advice cannot be found anywhere.

[Image from here.]

Merry Christmas, America. Hope you like crap.

Thanks. Thanks a lot, you gutless clueless corrupt morons.

From CNN at 11:40PM:

Washington (CNN) — Senate Democrats braved the aftermath of a blizzard Sunday to continue their push to pass a sweeping health care bill before Christmas.

Right. They were standing in the snow, shivering, while the Republicans kept the doors shut. Phew.

[Update 9:06PM: LIVE FEED HERE.]

[Update 10:24PM: 60-40. Wimps. Thank you, too, Mr. Lieberman.]

Another Great Gift Idea: LORBO

Skuuvuunuum LORBO indeed. If this doesn’t make you want to see Avatar, nothing will.

[Available from Jim Woodring’s store.  Sent via email from Madame Pupshaw.]