Author: Bunk Strutts

Boogah Boogah.

Mr. Lung Face Person Cushion

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Um, ah, you know, sometimes the words just don’t come easy when trying to describe something like Mr. Lung Face Person Cushion. Repulsive and attractive at the same time, and when you tickle him, he coughs.

Or maybe it’s Ms. Pink Apple-Shaped Windshield Face Person who just came into contact with a bloodless blue leaping newt at 50mph, and they both turned into a collectible plush toy.

But it could also be a comfy sanitary example of incomplete twinning en utero.

Oooh! Wait! It’s Cherchez “Churchy” LaFemme from Walt Kelly’s POGO looking at himself in a mirror!

I dunno, Babs, but I do know this. Someone thought this up, someone designed it, someone picked the colors and fabric, someone sewed it together, someone marketed it, and some folks are buying it, for someone else, for some unknown reason.

Some mysteries should just be left unsolved.

[Image from Chiquiworld.]

R2D2 Pukes

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StarWars emesis. And all this time I thought R2D2 only craps pepper in my salad.

[Image from here. Oh yeah, speaking of emesis, Diesel’s still hawking his book at MattressPolice if you’re looking for a last minute Christmas gift. He promises to deliver it in person if you order by midnight tonight. Otherwise, you can read it free on his website. Go figger.]

Saturday Matinee: PoorHamsterElPasoPleasePleasePlease

Here’s the original English version of “Poor Hamster.”

Pleasant harmonies with a good plot and a twisted father with a lot of video editing time makes this a must see. Bunk has been out of the loop on this one, but gives it 5 stars. (2 stars go to the cloying animated version.)

A related song immediately comes to mind. Here’s Marty!

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I don’t know how Marty Robbins pulled this one off, but here’s the MTV clip of his hit “El Paso” from 1959. The late Imogene Coca appears in a cameo as “Bellina.”

And speaking of Ike Turner, he passed on to Rock N Roll Heaven this past week.

Ike and his Kings of Rhythm recorded what’s regarded as the first Rock N Roll hit in 1951 with “Rocket 88.” Regardless of what you think of him, Ike & Tina Turner’s Rhythm & Blues Review was also very influential, but without the Ikettes, and especially Tina, he’d have been left as a footnote in the Cobra Records archives. (Ike’s in the gray Nehru jacket in the middle, but who’s that white guy on rhythm guitar? Steve Cropper?)

This is the best version of James Brown‘s “Please Please Please” that I’ve ever heard. Tina was amazing when Janis Joplin was still taking notes.

[“Poor Hamster” English version from here. Marty Robbins’ pic from here. His video is from the UToobage. Ike & Tina from here.]

TGIF: The .gif Friday Post 15 – “But, Ma-awm!”

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“Why won’t you come when your sister calls?!”
“Why won’t you come when your sister calls?!”
“Why won’t you come when your sister calls?!”

[Whoa. Fractals. Related post here, .gif image from here.]

Yet Another Great Gift Idea

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Just imagine… You have a holiday get together with your neighbors (the ones you actually talk to, not the one that has that strange odor coming from his house, or the ones with the 45-year-old son who never left home and lays face-down on the lawn across the street when you go to get the mail, or the one with three hearses in the driveway.)

A nice holiday gathering. A Hawai’ian theme complete with the apostrophe. Huge yellowfin and shark steaks are on the grille, and YOU bring out the salt. Not just any salt. Alaea Hawai’ian Sea Salt.

All your invited neighbors are visibly impressed with your obviously refined taste and culture.

Except for me, you dork. You bought into this? But I won’t tell it to your face. I’ll just smile and compliment you on your obviously refined taste and culture. Then I’ll make an innocuous comment about global warming and how OUR household is stopping it by changing the incandescent lightbulb outside our front door to a fluorescent lamp.

But tomorrow, I’ll have a good laugh with the 45-year-old neighbor’s son while we lay face down in the grass in front of the house with the three hearses next to the one that smells funny, and we’ll watch you get your mail and change your lightbulbs.

[Don’t creep out, it’s all in fun. “Salt-of-the-Month-Club” is available in limited quantities from The Onion. Looks like a great gift idea to me. I’d host the block party if I got it, fer shure (hint hint hint). —Bunk]

NG Almost Picks Up Strutts News Services Story

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Zanesville, Ohio (Strutts News Services) –

This month’s issue of the National Geographic was originally designed to feature the award-winning photo and story of the herd of captured Indricotheria, as first reported to TRITE (TackyRaccoons Investigation Team East, Strutts News Services) by doctoral candidates Mr. Lannie Foosers and Ms. Toonci Crumbler of the Cerro Gordo Oceanic Institute on this very website.

Foosers and Crumbler were all jumpy and jivey excited until they discovered that their ground-breaking contribution was neither acknowleged by National Geographic Magazine, nor was the story with the now-famous accompanying photo even published.

NatGeo Senior Apprentice-Editor-In-Training Bob “Bobby” Bieber explained his decision to spike the story. “The claims in the full-page NexLoid Chromioplasty advertisement were easier to confirm, so we shelved the Indricotheria blurb for now.”

[Okay, okay… NatGeo cover is from MagMyPic, and then I messed with it just a little. Still missing the original source for the original photo of the Indricotheria.]

Another Great Christmas Gift Idea

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Helps children to improve self-esteem, at least for the one who goes first. Boys go first on the blue one; Girls go first on pink (not shown).

[Image from EatLiver.]

International Blog Cup “Competition” Results

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I know all of you were waiting with bait-breath to find out if Tacky Raccoons made the first round cut in the “International Blog Cup” competition. We didn’t, even though I, Bunk, voted for myself twice each day for a week.

On the plus side, TR won well over 48% of the votes against a dopey music video advertisement website that takes no talent to post. Bill Clinton got elected President by a smaller percentage. Bunky regards the loss as a bittersweet victory.

34 to 32 is the final count, and TR conceded to our worthy opponent last night at about 11:55PM.  34 votes for our worthy opponent equals only five people who voted each day for a week and who like music videos posted on a bland website that gets it’s material solely from YouTube, and posted without commentary.  Oooh. Beat me, Daddy, Eight to the Bar.  Smacked down by a bot.

But we have more fun, don’t we. Heh.

[Image above from Hanuman showing all 32 TR hits. All in fun. –Bunk]

Wrong. Just wrong. Wait. Maybe It’s Right.

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Yep she’s preggo. Yep, she’s a Red Sox fan. And yep, there’s someone who specializes in adorning preggo bellies with graphics. Thank God it’s not me. Funny that someone would want a stranger painting their gut, slightly disturbing that someone else enjoys doing it for them, and scary that a lot of you don’t believe me and are going to click on the link to see more. Don’t do it.

[Link from GrowABrain, image with more preggo belly designs here.]

Saturday Matinee: Past Future & Present Past

Vodpod videos no longer available. from s166.photobucket.com posted with vodpod

No Way. Can’t happen. Get outta here. [Via Snopes.]

1960 precursor to Star Trek from East Germany, according to the U-to0bage description:

Here’s a look at “the world’s largest supercomputer” in the socialist utopian future predicted by a 1960 East German science fiction film

The movie is “Der Schweigende Stern,” released in the west as “First Spaceship on Venus.”

Like other Soviet-bloc films, it forecast a utopian future in which socialist scientific advancement led the world.

In this scene, the scientists are using the supercomputer to decipher an alien message recorded on a device ejected from an alien spacecraft before it crashed.

And speaking of Star Trek, one of the funniest Saturday Night Live clips, (with William Shatner as Captain Kirk, Chevy Chase as Spock, Bill Murray as Bones, on the bridge of the Starship Enterprise after the series was canceled) should have appeared below. But NBC apparently convinced uT00B and g00ggle to drop all the video links for copyright violations. It’s as if NBC wanted to erase all evidence of the years when Saturday Night Live was actually funny.

So here’s this gem [originally scheduled for a later post]: The Dap-Kings featuring Sharon Jones. Music & video uses 1960’s technology for recording and taping this modern band with the stylings of early R&B. “Almost Aretha” is a pretty good compliment.