Category: Humor

Babe Magnet 28

Dang. Where do we start? This is such a POS non-babemagnet that it’s hardly worth the time to extrapolate the inner workings of Dork28, covered in puffy paint and adorned with  flame decals created with cat fur dipped in tempera. There is so much unappreciated and unnecessary effort put into that embarrassmobile that my jaw not only drops, it runs away screaming.

The only redeeming quality this vehicle d’ vapid has is the crystalline cubes of broken tempered glass that covers the floor mats, and that’s not exactly a plus because of the stains and the….

Okay. I’ve got to back off on this one.  Dude, decorating your ride with Play-Doh and painting the bumper with “Poor Man Mark” just doesn’t cut it in The World of Babe Magentage. You might have been able to pull this off with a bottle of JD in your fist or maybe…

Hell. Who am I kidding. Sorry, dude. Can’t justify it. You’re on your own with this one. Your ride sucks serious donkeys.

[Image found here. Don’t miss our glorious Babe Magnet Archive.]

Spittlebugs In The Rosemary

Spittlebug, Spittlebug
Does whatever a Spittlebug does…

…like suck on the missus’ rosemary bush and make little foamy things to hide its sorry-ass nymphy self.

There are spittlebugs in the rosemary. This is serious, at least according to the missus, but I looked into it. They make little foamy nests in the crooks of the stems to hide from predators and to keep from drying out, while they suck juices from the stems of the host plant. They are the nymph stage of froghoppers, and although they can do temporary damage to the host plant, they usually die off in a couple of weeks.

The nymph that I uncovered today was the shape of a small ladybug, about 1/16th of an inch long. It was black on the front and yellow on the rear – half and half. Treating the infestation means hitting the little foaming bastards with the hose, or just ignoring them.

To be truthful, that’s a TUBE Spittlebug in the picture. The spittlebug nymph that I examined today looks nothing like it. I’m sure I pissed him off when I got him on my fingernail to eyeball him, because the look he gave me back, well, let’s just say he wished he was bigger so he could kick my ass.

In any case, he got PWND big time, yet was released to foam again… somewhere else.

[Image found via teh google.]

Monday Paparrazi

This image has been sitting around in the cooler for too long. Rather than dump it, this is for the Monday Morning Warriors who make it all happen.

[Found here.]

Russian Stadium Troll

Yeah, YOU tell him “Молчи, мудак.”

[Image found in here, buried among photos of Russian women’s sand volley ball tournament. NSFK]

Saturday Matinee – Country Dick Montana Tribute, The Blasters, Levi & The Rockats, The Reverend Horton Heat, Johnny Carroll & His Hot Rocks

Nice tribute to the late Country Dick Montana at The Belly Up in Solana Beach, CA, November 2010. From the Utoobage:

Dave Alvin sings the song “Beat Generation“, and is joined by members of the Beat Farmers, Candy Kane, Peter Case, Mojo Nixon, Cindy Lee Berryhill, and others…

Here’s Dave Alvin & The Blasters with “Marie Marie.” I saw them at the Whiskey in 1980.

Another band from the punkabilly scene: Levi  & The Rockats on the Mike Douglas Show, 1979. (That hepcat on bass is hilarious.)

Reverend Horton Heat’s “Psychobilly Freakout.” [Don’t watch if you’re epileptic…]

Johnny Carroll & His Hot Rocks “Rockin’ Maybelle” is the real deal from about 1957.

Too hot to handle and too cold to hold. Those should keep you jumpin’  jivin’ and wailin’ for a while. See you back here tomorrow.

Food To Go

[Found here.]

By Wednesday, Johnson Had Gone Scooters.


[Found here.]

WTF is a Fire Duck?

Yep. That’s a WTF Duck Sled for sure, and it’s a bonafide Babe Magnet. I want a fleet of ’em. [More photos here.]

Saturday Matinee – The Starwars Zone, Keith Richards, Chuck Berry, Johnny Johnson, Silvan Zingg & Johnny Winter

[Found here.]

Poor Keith. Just couldn’t follow directions. Johnny Johnson‘s blank stares are great.

Here’s Johnny Johnson’s version of Meade Lux Lewis‘ “Honky Tonk Train Blues.”

Here I was thinking that Pinetop Smith wrote HTTB, and the wiki proved me wrong just in time. Unfortunately there are no videos of Pinetop Smith in action, but Silvan Zingg is awesome. From Switzerland, here’s “Pinetop’s Boogie Woogie.”

Now how to wrap this up…

Yep, Johnny Winter‘s “Mojo Boogie” does it. Have a great weekend, folks and be back here for more fun tomorrow.

The .Gif Friday Post No.184 – Atlantis, 1st Base, Iguana Caress

[Found here, here and here.]