Category: Bizarre

28 MARCH 8:30PM – PARTY LIKE IT’S 2009

Earth Hour – Let’s celebrate!

At 8:30PM tonight, make sure you turn all your lights on, power up your TVs and stereos, and celebrate the Technological Achievements of Humanity.  Get in your cars and drive somewhere, just for the sake of it, and just for fun.  Raise and lower your garage doors, and run your washing machines.  Run the dryer without anything in it.  Got a power mower? Crank it up.  Heat up your cat’s food  in the microwave.  Take your dog out to Burger King.  Make as many long distance telephone calls as you can.  Run your dishwasher with half of the normal load, and run the other half separately.  Open up your refrigerator door, and look without removing anything to eat.  Do it again.  Download updates for all your computer programs and email them to all your friends.

LET’S CELEBRATE AMAZING ACHIEVEMENTS FOR A CHANGE!

“But why should I do that?” you ask.  I’ll tell you.

We’re fighting Global Cooling.  Mostly we’re fighting Global Idiocy, but let’s call it Global Cooling for now.  The feel-good crowd will never know the difference anyway.

Those folks who think that turning their electricity off for an hour will “save the planet” (or “send a message” to someone or something) are the same folks who stood outside their homes a couple of years ago with candle wax dripping over their fingers, believing that the space shuttle was gonna zoom by and take a photo of the earth lit up with peace candles.  My message is:

PUT YOUR LIGHTS ON!

The Amazing WTF

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Recently I re-ran into Unfinished Rambler who linked to the Hero Factory and I just had to play:  went with my instincts, entered my super powers honestly and was rewarded with that lame-o title.  The Hero Factory is kinda like Wikipedia on steroids… 80% accurate, but 20% gets mixed in with the leftover chili.

I’ll accept my alter-ego orange afro image with a kickass flame thrower:  too hot to handle, and too cold to hold.  Execute Mode Enabled.

Me Sees U…

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…and me gonna tell someone.

[Image from here.]

Mr. Chucklehead

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From “60 Minutes” comes this disturbing report:

President Barack Obama said he believes the global financial system remains at risk of implosion with the failure of Citigroup or AIG, touching off “an even more destructive recession and potentially depression.”

His remarks came in a “60 Minutes” interview in which he was pressed by an incredulous Steve Kroft for laughing and chuckling several times while discussing the perilous state of the world’s economy.

“You’re sitting here. And you’re— you are laughing. You are laughing about some of these problems. Are people going to look at this and say, ‘I mean, he’s sitting there just making jokes about money—’ How do you deal with— I mean: explain…” Kroft asks at one point.

“Are you punch drunk?” Kroft says.

“No, no. There’s gotta be a little gallows humor to get you through the day,” Obama says, with a laugh.

Good God.

[Full transcript here.]

Mr. T vs. Chuck Norris vs. …FRANK?!

Sunday funnies extraordinaire.

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Rarely do I laugh out loud at internest humor, but this absurd mashup is pure efficient genius.  Full story here, via here.

[Several very related archived posts may be retrieved and perused here and here.]

Ice Refund

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Once when the power went out I went to the store and bought several of bags of ice to save the foodstuffs in our refrigerator, but when I got back to the house, the power was back on. So I took the bags of ice back to the store, told them the ice was defective, that it didn’t cool properly. They refunded my money with no questions.

[Image from here.]

Charlie. With an attitude that’s about to snap.

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[Updated with full panel]

[Image from here via Neatorama.]

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

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Since we can’t post SeeqPod music on WordPress yet, I dropped a small load on Amy Oops.  Meanwhile, here’s a fightin’ song: The Pogues’ “Young Ned of the Hill.”

[Image from here.]

“Congratulations! You Are A Piece of ____ !”

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You’ve seen them.  They began on the C and D Blogs, and they’re all over the B Blogs now. Dopey questionnaires that ask you to answer five or six odd questions, none of which can be answered wrong. Then you submit your answers, and the magic internest blogsite genii tells you what kind of breakfast cereal you are, or some such drivel.

Don’t know what I’m railing about? Here are a few examples:

What kind of afro-desiac are you?

What kind of paper clip do you most resemble?

If you were a freakin’ cupcake, would you be less of a dork?

What kind of imaginary powers that would raise you up from your own miserable pathetic little life that you would wish for, assuming you have a life to begin with?

The results of these inane surveys are then posted on the authors’ websites with a proclamation such as “I am a furry little wombat/budgie hybrid who enjoys hot cocoa.”  Barf.

So, then, I have a proposal for y’all.  Whenever and wherever you find a blog that asks you to take a dopey “What Kind Of ___ Am I”  type quiz, don’t bother clicking on the link.  Just answer “I’m Asparagus.” No further explanation is necessary.

Let’s get rid of this obnoxious trend so we can get on with REALLY inane blogging, like cat snoring videos:

The .gif Friday post 71 – Animals

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