[Oktoberfest costumes found here, via here; the Superheroes & The Addams Family in here.]
Category: Holidays
Halloween Demon Duckies
Happy Halloween Meth Edition
Make Halloween Great Again
Now THAT’s a TRUMPKIN.
“Don’t open the door, Honey. It’s that damn Narwhal kid again.”
[Found here.]
Happy Columbo Day!
The feat was both amazing and dangerous, especially given the limited technology of the time. The world was much larger than anyone had previously imagined, and relatively little had been recorded by seagoing cartographers. Much of what they compiled was inaccurate, but they were not completely in the dark.
They had the Martellus Map of 1489 [pictured above].
Cristoforo Colombo changed all that, and for that he should be remembered. He had big cojones, as did every sailor who joined him on his voyages into the unknown. I doubt that his financial supporters (including Queen Isabella of Spain) expected him to ever return from the first exploration, but he did, and he made several round-trip voyages after that, relying on seasonal trade winds.
Here’s to one of the greatest explorers in history.
Happy Labor Day
Crack open some beer and hoist one to everyone who works for a living.
Independence Day 1906
When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
Read it in its entirety, and then read it to your children.
Manikins, Watermelons & Fireworks: A Deadly Mix
Proof that manikins have no business setting off fireworks. Jump to 01:00 for the splodeys.
Don’t shoot bottle rockets at each other’s eyes or hold exploding M-80s, kids, and definitely don’t lean over a firework that’s going to shoot into the air and explode [via].
They could at least have made it more realistic and scattered some empty beer cans around. Here’s one with an appropriate soundtrack from 2010:
The manikins recovered from their injuries (several times) but they never learn from their mistakes. This one’s from 2009:
[Above videos courtesy of the U.S. Consumer Products Safety Commission.]
Meanwhile, this guy’s got some manikin blood in him.
Yeah, the explosion turned the lights on and changed his shirt, but so what. It’s still a classic.
Be sane tomorrow, and if you can’t manage that, at least be safe.
REMEMBER.
Tacky Raccoons 