Seasonal Fail
Category: Stupid
Bunk’s Days in the Service… Industry
A long time ago, in the late ages of black and white TV, Bunk worked in the service industry. Grunt jobs in restaurants and hotels. Pot washer. Busboy. Bellhop. Toilet scrubber. Shag carpet raker. Drunk patron helperouter
I was one of three bellhops wearing Hilton monkey suits. Think of three PeeWee Herman/Eddie Haskell type weasels lurking just inside the front doors of a fancy hotel. We were like that.
Besides humping bags all over the hotel, we ran room service and operated a satellite AVIS car rental desk. We were paid less than minimum wage as we were expected to make up the rest in tips.
We got creative.
The .Gif Friday Post 61: Honka Chickm Honka Chickm Honka Chickm Honka Chickm
Everybody Sing:
“HonkaChickmHonkaChickmHonkaChickmHonkaChickmHonkaChickm…”
[Update 24 December 2008: Loyal Reader Planetross noted that this .gif syncs nicely with the Ramones vid above. Is this a Great Country or what?}
Self Explanatory.
[From here.]
Yeah. Right. As If.
‘Spose you wanna leave a comment, huh. G’head. Tell us something we don’t already know.
At least I didn’t camp out in front of Fry’s Electronics for 11 hours just to buy a four-dimensional battery charger for $57.99 plus 36 month’s worth of vapors for access.
Meh.
Another Great Gift Idea: Sick Japanese Dog With Infectious Saliva Game!
Okay, um, lessee. You open the sickly dog’s skull, stick his tongue to the roof of his mouth and pour in a bunch of green slime with little tidbits in it. Now the sinuses are loaded. Close the head, and doggy drools infected pus with candies that you try to retrieve with electrified tweezers before they land on his tongue.
But here’s the excellent twist: If you pick the wrong tidbit, you are awarded with 110V of Japanese current coursing through your metacarpals. Hilarity ensues as you roll on the floor convulsing uncontrollably. Everyone’s a loser in this game, not just you!
It still doesn’t beat “Pie Face” as our all-time favorite strategy game, but it’s a close second.
[Found at RGS, with many more to choose from. Nice archive of gifts here.]
Hot Christmas
[Crappy Christmas Album Covers from Amy Oops. But beware of Charlie the Hamster downloads… Firefox says they gots malware attachments.]
Growing Dogs: Part 1 – Planting
Pisgah, Ohio (Strutts News Services) – Anyone who has tried to raise big dogs in the city understands the difficulties involved. One authority, Ms. Tooncie Crumbler, has beat the odds and raised several healthy crops of Retrievers Golden outside her flat in downtown Pisgah.
“Assuming you start with good stock, all it takes are a few clippings, good soil, and bone meal mulch to get ’em to take root and prosper,” said Ms. Crumbler, 78. “Then you have to keep them watered. They do better in the shade, otherwise they tend to wither, and you have to crop ’em back occasionally.”
When asked about the sprouts observed outside of the planters, Ms. Crumbler initially denied their existence, but admitted that she was embarrassed for not having weeded the strays as often as she’d like.
“Once I get me some more planters, I’ll dig ’em up and pot ’em. Until then, they’re just weeds to me.”
Babe Magnet: Batbug!
Some folks take Batman lore very seriously. And why not? There are no laws, at least in this country, that forbid rabid BatFannage. This particular example is very deceiving in that it efficiently transforms the ubiquitous beetle into the ORIGINAL BATMOBILE with relatively little effort. Yeah, mock it all you want, but then compare it with the genuine item that we’ve provided for your viewing pleasure below:
Okay, the bottom image is a model of the 1940’s version, but you can’t deny the awesome resemblance. Therefore, the esteemed panel of judges at TR have voted unanimously to declare the VW Batmobile to be honored as a true and bonafide Babe Magnet.
On the other side of the coin is BatMockage, and here is a prime but innocent example. 7 out of 8 mocked him correctly. The other one is destined to be an online furnace filter consultant.
Top Image from this FINE collection of batpoopage
(pronounced, bot’ pu pazh‘). Second image, slightly doctored, from here. Bottom image from here. Continue reading “Babe Magnet: Batbug!”
Tacky Raccoons 
