Category: New Snot

Amazon’s Wood Kindling

[Found here.  Read the rest here.]

Climategate Summarized

Norwich, England (Strutts News Services) – Since all of the raw data regarding climate change  has been finally released to the public for scrutiny after many years of cooperation by the keepers of such proprietary knowledge and research, we at Tacky Raccoons believe it is our duty to present this data in a form that is easily understandable to all sentient beings.

(Click on any graph to enlarge it.)

This first graph illustrates the Vapors Constant. It reflects the ideal average temperature of the globe, without meandering from the mean average.

This graph shows the Vapors Constant, and adds the values purported by the Bieber-Naughton studies as well as the Moholy-Nagy data.

Here we retain the Vapors Constant while showing the results of Zager & Evans/Fooser-Bieber Conundrum. Note that they diverge.

Combining all four studies and retaining the Vapors Constant, results in the graph above.

Using the Strutts-Crumbler method, and overlaying the previous data sources, the results coagulate into a recobinizable pattern.  This pattern can be simplified further.

Once the data are resolved and mushed around a bit, the patterns become intuitively obvious to the casual observer.

It’s the elusive “Hockey Puck” of global warming.

We’re doomed.

[Update 4 Dec 09: Additional related archived posts here.]

Bite My Hot Links

Get Off My Blog_Bite Me Comics 091018

Anyone paying attention to the ongoing LGF soap opera will appreciate Bite Me Comics.  If you’re not, consider yourself fortunate.

Diesel’s book “Mercury Falls” is out on amazon. He’s  a funny guy who helped me get my blogging mojo. (More info here.)

The man who saved billions from starvation who you’ve probably never heard of: Norman Borlaug (1914-2009). Related video here (includes some unnessesary foul language from Penn Gillette).

Turning Number 1. I’ve got no clue what this is all about, but it’s yet more propaganda showing that the guy is always the idiot.

Little kids and the marshmallow torture.

Charlie Rose interviews himself and Steve is not happy. [Found here.]

Just click it. Do it. [Tip o’ the tarboosh to Bordm.]

Another TED video by someone I’ve never heard of talks about perceived value.

How not to get killed or maimed on the golf course (tip from Ken A.).

This page is under construction (via The Presurfer).

Tacky Raccoons Greatest Hit

Brando WordPress

Folks–

On 21 December 2007, the record was set for the amount of traffic in one day, with almost 15K.  That record was broken yesterday with over 20,500 hits.

Thanx to the folks who linked on Digg, Reddit, Stumbleupon, Twitter and Facebook, and thanx also to our regular visitors. Y’all made my day.
—–
Late breaking news: WordPress is having a contest, and this post is our official entry.
—–

[Update:  After reconsideration, we decided to delete the poll. It was pointless, as we’ll never have a “tip jar” on this site.]

[Update: Famous last words.]

Michelle O. Action (Go) Figure

Michelle Obama_AFP-Getty ImagesMichelle Obama Toy_Mail Online 091013Michell Obama Lego

The latest gimmick to hit the market just in time for Halloween: The First Lady Action Figure. It is being heralded as the first toy in the likeness of Michelle Obama.  WRONG.

I like to boil things down to their essence, and the toy on the right gets my vote for Toy of the Year, especially with the photoshopoopage of the photo on the left. Those proportions just aren’t right, even for Barbie.

In context, the toy on the right is immediately recobanizeable as The First Lady in all her glory, just as Aretha Franklin and Barbara and George Bush were similarly memoribalised below:

Lego Aretha Franklin

Here at TR, our crack team of webminers previously posted Lego’s Contribution for the adulation of the devout:  a full landscape model of THE INAUGURATION.   It’s awesome.

But Michelle’s action figure is still not as awesome as this one.

Which one is the new Junior Lieutenant?

Camouflage Fail_FeelsRU 090923

Hint:  He’s immortal.
Also he’s traditionally known in the ranks as the FNG.
[Found in here.]

Yep. It’s Time Again to Wash Your ‘Pods.

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Cold water, gentle cycle, no bleach, then line dry so they don’t shrink up. Cool iron only, no steam.

Wash them twice a year only, in March and August (it’s not too late for this season), and your hats should last a lifetime.

Better yet, have a ‘Pod Wash Party like we did last week. While the hats were drying, they cooled the patio as well.  If you folks have had a ‘Pod Wash recently, post your stories in the comments. (Don’t be shy… just about everybody has at least one tale to tell!)

[Related post here, more here. Image found buried in here. ]

Gnome Herding Declared Illegal in Oz

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Cootamundra, New South Wales, AU (Strutts News Services) –
In a bold move, Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd declared a state of emergency in this small shire of 5,600 after more than 1,500 gnomes were discovered in captivity on Thursday.  Many of the captive ornamentals showed signs of neglect, and all appeared relieved to be freed from their captor.

“An allotment of four gnomes per person is unfathomable,” declared Rudd. “It flies in the face of everything this country stands for.”

Although Rudd acknowledged that some of the gnomes were not full grown and had barely sprouted when the farm was discovered, he condemned the practice as barbaric. “These gnomes were not intended for distribution to those in need across New South Wales, but were earmarked for export.  It’s no secret that such trafficking is illegal.”

[Spokespersons for VE Imports, the world’s largest gnome trader, did not return our phone calls and were unavailable for comment.]

When asked about gnome farmer and property owner Cobber Bluey, the locals eyed the ground in reverence.  “He’s gone,” said neighbor Marcy Dotes. “He stepped over the line ten times too many, the bastard.”

[Image from Neatorama; corroborating source here.]

Stump Bunk

800px-Waschbaer_auf_dem_Dach

We’re up to about 17 regular viewers here after thousands of hours of effort, and it’s starting to pay off.  As we drift aimlessly into Our Third Annum of existance, our Crack Team of Webminers suggested another poll.  It’s a very simple yes/no thingy, and it’s free.

CTW thought we might want to venture into the realm of comments, i.e., post nothing of substance, but use the post itself as a comment generator.

We’re gonna ignore the poll for now, but leave your pertinent questions in the comments section and we’ll respond after leaving the toilet seat up and flushing with our feet. Depending on the volume (of questions) we may answer all in one post, or spread them out over the lawn to hose ’em down later.

Bill Murray: Posterchild for Socialism?

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[Found here because they linked to us. Appears to be a pro-communist Swedish blog, but I dunno, Babs.]