Category: True Stories

Form I-485: How to fill out Part 3C

Never heard of OMB No. 1615-0023? I hadn’t either. Here’s another hint: Form I-485. I doubt that it rings a bell with many readers here, so here’s the scoop. Form I-485 is entitled “Application to Register Permanent Residence or Adjust Status.“

In other words, it’s one of the first steps toward becoming a Citizen of the United States of America, and the 6-page questionnaire (18 Jan 11) is brilliant. It carefully screens out undesirables based upon several carefully crafted questions. Sections 1, 2, 4 & 5 are reasonable, as they ask for name, country of origin, relatives, etc, and if you might be Elian Gonzales, in which case you’re screwed.

Section 3C of Form I-485 should be retitled “Are You F**kin’ Stupid?” Continue reading “Form I-485: How to fill out Part 3C”

How Not To Present The Evidence

I doubt her case was dismissed, but she was likely awarded a second one.

[Found here.]

The ScenicBruiser: Another One Rides The Bust

Roll up for The Tragical History Tour of all 57 States on The STIMUBUS!

To be fair, that’s the tour bus from when Obama was campaigning for President Senator Governor Mayor Teacher Community Activist, and we apologize for the innocuous snark – NOT. It appears that he’s envious of someone else’s bus tour (whose name we won’t mention, but her initials are Sarah Palin).

Doug Ross@Journal posted what is purportedly a sketch of Obama’s ScenicBruiser, but it’s intuitively obvious to the casual observer that the image was cropped [view original here; click on the image below to enlarge].

The original image was definitely cropped as it eliminated the trailer labeled “Fox” at the rear. At first we thought that it might be Michelle’s private trailer, but everyone knows that her caboose is much bigger. Therefore it must refer to FOX News, installed as a design afterthought, with a hydraulic pin to make it easy to disconnect. (And, yes, the steering wheel is on the wrong side, as Obama cruises on the left.)

[Crossposted from here.]

1904 Budweiser Commercial

[Song lyrics and link to recording below the break.]

Continue reading “1904 Budweiser Commercial”

Hot Links of the Beat Generation

Geese Teeth here.

“Zoom Zoom Zoom” by Jimmy and the Barbarellos is great a capella.

What’s your favorite number? Tell this guy.

Click and scroll down for the Snooty Cam. You’ll like it.

Interview with a 1-year old, with subtitles.

“It’s A Good Life” was a short story written by Jerome Bixby in 1953 that was turned into one of the creepiest Twilight Zone episodes ever.

Beat Generation was written by Rod McKuen.

The Late Country Dick Montana had a solo EP. Listen to snippets here (NSFW).

Wow. I’d never heard of “Action Park.” This amusement park was so dangerous the owners were forced to buy additional ambulances for the local hospital.  Lemur King mentioned it here, with additional links here, here and here.

Heading to Senegal this summer? An English-Wolof dictionary might come in handy.

Conway’s Game of Life is a fun curiosity from a few decades ago.

Ever seen a hook-faced conehead? You will if you click here.

Saturday Matinee – Glassblowing, Giant Rabbits, Paul Reubens, Delinquents, Riding the Curb

I took glassblowing in college in the middle of winter. Pure awesome. The instructors all had scars, and our own teacher accidentally sat on glow worm. Burned his ass in glass class.

The biggest danger was blowing the bubble. Inhale super-heated air by accident and you’re gonna die. [h/t Woosk]

Night of the Lepus Trailer. Big bunnies be eatin’ and killin’.

Pee Wee Herman Unmasked! Interview with Paul Reubens.

Mr. Grimes was a dick. I like him, at least in the first half of this instructional video from 1947.

11 years later, Mr. Grime’s protégés were curb dragging in 1958 L.A.

Have a great weekend and be back here tomorrow for more fun.

Yaakaar Nag Weccit – Jérérjëf Suma Boopa

Soo demee marse, nga jendal ma jis.

[Image found here. Translation from here.]

Banksy in L.A.

Banksy is not one of my favorite angst-driven graffiti artists, mainly because I don’t agree with his politics, and secondly because graffiti is vandalism. Aside from that, this is clever.

[Found here.]

In Cat Land

Courtesy of Bunkarina. That cat was previously featured here.

The Last Resort

[Found here.]