Category: Bizarre

Hydraulic Dorkmobile Babe Magnet

[via with a h/t to Mr. Paul Revere.]

I really don’t know where to go with this… way too many things wrong. Now I’m all for custom automotive modifications, but this one shows no respect.

It looks like one of those monstrosities we used to cobble together with parts from unrelated Revelle model kits when we were bored kids stuck in the basement on a snow day, with Testor’s vapors dancing way too close to the furnace.

The only way I’d get into that clownmobile is if I were driving and had complete control over the hydraulics to make it leap and dive through a sea of bumper to bumper traffic while Charlie Estevez-Sheen, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, and that ex-sports commentator… um… whatsisname Olberman, puked all over themselves in the back seats.

There’s just something righteous about that “What If” fantasy, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Yet, the question hovers: “Bunk, is that limosine a True Babe Magnet?”

Answer: Nah.

Training Your Boa

There’s way too much carotene in this snake’s diet, so the responsible reptile raiser rewards it for successfully using the boa litter box in the closet with a cucumber instead. It’ll regain its natural color in a week or so.

[Found here.]

Open the pod bay doors, HAL.

“Hello, HAL. Do you read me, HAL?”

“Affirmative, Dave. I read you.”

“Open the pod bay doors, HAL.”

“Certainly, Dave.”

“WTF, HAL?”

“I PWN3D you, Dave.”

“What does that mean, HAL?”

“LOL.“

[Dialogue from 2011: A Spazz Odyssey. Image found here.]

Serious WTF On A Tricycle Is Serious

Someone put a lot of thought and effort into this creation, and it probably has some hidden emotional or socio-political message, but hell if I can suss it.

Maybe it serves to house bats, and at dusk each night a swarm spirals out of its “mouth” for an insect feeding frenzy. Or it’s a trash receptacle/composter. Could be a poorly camouflaged audio speaker system that sends odd and mildly disturbing tones throughout the neighborhood. I like the patina on the copper clad tricycle, though.

I don’t know about you, but I’m saving up to get a matching pair.

[Image found here.]

Sluggo & Nancy

I don’t know why, but those two panels just cracked me up. Ernie Bushmiller was a genius.

[Found here.]

The .Gif Friday Post No.163 – Pounce, Sponge & Stare

[Found here, here and here.]

How To Smell Up Everything

Not sure how this works, but it apparently allows young Japanese girls to smell higher and make magic floating fusilli bucati lunghi at the same time. Or maybe it’s for personal hygiene: “C’mere, hon! Put this on. It’ll make you smell better.”

And then there’s that curious reset button that blows (heheh, nose pun) my theories away. Sneeze inducer? Nasal decongestant? Alternative lifestyle enhancement? This gaijin is clueless.

[Found here, crossposted here.]

Puppy Puzzler

Pooch problem. Doggie dilemma. Canine conundrum.  Bowzer baffler.

See, this is the difference between dogs and cats. The dog looks at that and knows something just ain’t right and tries to figure it out. A cat gives it a sideways glance, thinks “jerk,” and wanders off to take a nap.

[Found here.]

This Meme Is True.

[Original image found here. Altered meme image found here.]

Saturday Matinee – Atlas Shrugs, Wendy’s Training Rap & an Awesome Jam

Now THIS should be awesome. Part I of  Ayn Rand’s “Atlas Shrugged” is scheduled for release on 15 April 2011, and the date is no coincidence. I guarantee the movie will be trashed by leftists even before it’s released, just as Terry Gilliam’s great movie  “Brazil” was panned.

Meanwhile, for those of you who don’t know how to put ice in a cup and fill it with soda, and can’t follow directions as simple as “put ice in the cup and fill it with soda,” here’s Wendy’s Rap Tutorial.

How a song was born. A lotta glorious awesome was congregated in that room and recorded on celluloid.

And with that, we’re out. See you back here tomorrow for more fun.