Diesel, aka Robert Kroese, helped me to get into Big Time Blogging with cordial honest advice. Buy his books, read them, then donate them as gifts to the homeless. –Bunk
Category: Humor
Black Friday at Heck’s Department Store
The .Gif Friday Post No.308 – Hamster Eyeballs, Rambovine & Balancing Baby
Happy Thanksgiving
It amazes me to think that in September 1620, 102 people were so fed up with the English monarchy that they were willing to risk a dangerous late-season voyage across the Atlantic (that lasted over two months at sea) to a new land to establish a free colony.
Disease, scurvy, starvation and weather exposure took their toll, and half of them died before the following spring. In March of 1621, the survivors sought to establish Plymouth Rock, ventured ashore, and met an escaped British slave named Squanto who spoke English.
His first words to William Bradford were:
“Dude. This is a swamp. You f’d up. Y’all gonna die an’ stuff.”
Bradford replied, “Bro, WTF?”
“Here. Plant some of this, but put a fish under it.”
“Dude, no way.”
“Way. Just do it.”
“K. By the way, we got a plow.”
“Get out. You got a what? What you need a plow on a boat for?”
“We got one. You got an ox?”
“Ordered one on Amazon, but he ain’t showed up yet. They walk slow.”
“Cool. We’re gonna pop some pheasant for supper. Y’all wanna come?”
“Hell yeah. We’ll bag some Bambi and see you about 4.”
And the rest is history.
Have a great holiday, folks, and never forget the Reason for Thanksgiving.
[Image from here.]
The Curse of The Red Shirt
“Sorry, lil’ buddy, but it’s true. You’re a goner within 10 minutes of the first commercial.”
The only one who escaped The Curse Of The Red Shirt was Scottie. He was strong. He was invincible. He was Lt. Commander Scott.
[Image found here.]
Big Little Green Army Men
Yeah, we had ’em.
We’d split them up, Germans vs. Allies, set them up in the dirt, then each of us would shoot rubber bands at the opponent’s “army.” If the rubber band knocked over a soldier, he was taken off of the battlefield as KIA.
If you shot a rubber band off your thumb, hit or miss, it became part of your opponent’s arsenal. If you were a good shot but too aggressive, you might run out of rubberband ammo and lose the battle. Strategy & Tactics for 8 year old boys.
Balcony
Karma Happens.
The .Gif Friday Post No.307 – FoxTongue, Hot Dog In The Fridge & Pup Can’t Ski
James Brown was Stillborn.
Not to disparage the late Butane James, but being born dead and recovering is one helluva fetus. Aside from that, this compilation is completely awesome.
