Tacky Raccoons

Rightful, Righteous, Indignant & Indigenous Hot Links

Montreal police stopped to ticket an illegally parked DeLorean – made out of snow.

20 great stories of passive/agressive revenge. More here.

THE INSULT FILE includes such gems as this one:

“You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. You are the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel. You wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing that you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won’t make it. I beg for sweet death to come and remove me from a world which became unbearable when the bioterrorists designed you.”

Parrot sounds off after his hated cage is destroyed. [NSFW, NSFK h/t Octopus]

Ah dinnae ken “air beige” until it was explained in this short video on Scottish slang [via].

Nice collection of Ed “Big Daddy” Roth graphics. More of Roth’s work here.

On sanctuary cities: Los Angeles residents spoke up at a City Board of Supervisors meeting before they were shut down (March 2017). The rude condescension of Supervisor Sheila Kuehl to her own constituents is stunning.

The J.C. Whitney Catalogue was the equivalent of a phonebook for amateur and professional auto mechanics. So many things I wanted (like a Klaxon horn) and so many things I couldn’t afford as a teenager. I bought a vinyl black “leather” jacket for $14 and a can of “Smell-Nu” for my ’57 Chevy. Worked so well I made my bedroom, bathroom, hallway, family room and kitchen smell like a new car. Mom was not pleased.

For $4 you can get a rear wheel outer grease seal for your 1928-38 Ford Model A. Presses into hub and keeps dirt out of the roller bearing, but you’re going to need two.

[Top image: 19th century loon-shaped Tsimshian seal grease bowl, found here.]

Saturday Matinee – Paul Simon and Chevy Chase, Tito Larriva & Tom Waits

By the end of the week I usually have a couple of videos already in the queue, but I found I had none ready to post, so I defaulted to retro vids.

A 2011 Paul Simon performance of “Kodachrome caught my ear. The missus walked in and asked why I was listening to that sappy song. I said I needed to post something for Saturday.

“If you’re going to post a Paul Simon video, it should be You Can Call Me Al with Chevy Chase,” and she’s right. It’s a classic, and it’s also the best Paul Simon video ever.

He ducked back down the alley
With some roly-poly little bat-faced girl

IIRC, that was recorded about the same time that David Byrne was doing his own version of international music, like featuring Tito Larriva:

Then there’s this.
Tom Waits took Psychobilly to a new dimension in 2006.

Have a great weekend, folks, and don’t worry. Everything is gonna be all right despite what the doom mongers tell you.

The .Gif Post No.520 – Demon Alcohol, Parkour Flooby & Biermeister Oopsie

[Found here, here and here.]

North Korea celebrates 50th Anniversary of the capture of the USS Pueblo

Captured crewmembers of the USS PUEBLO giving the “Hawaiian Good Luck Sign,” 1968.

[USNI News 24 January 2018.]

North Korea celebrated the 50th anniversary of the USS Pueblo (AGER-2) incident on Tuesday via broadcasts on state television and in an international press statement.

In 1968, the North Korean Navy captured the signals intelligence ship USS Pueblo (AGER-2) and its crew of 82 sailors. The sailors suffered starvation and torture and were used for propaganda purposes for almost a year before a release was negotiated in December of 1968.
[…]
Pueblo’s crew resisted when possible, most notably by frequently raising their middle fingers to ruin propaganda photo ops staged by the North Koreans, telling their captors the gesture was considered a “Hawaiian Good Luck Sign,” according to the Navy investigation. The crew was severely beaten near the end of their confinement when the North Koreans learned the gesture’s true meaning.

[More at the link above.]

Carole was a hottie.

“A small, wrinkled Glass-man examined Niles as a younger one stared at Carole.”

[Found here.]

Julia Child was a Muppet.

[Found here.]

Good Samaritan Finds Lost Items, Returns Them To Owner

[Found here.]

Gluten-Packed Hot Links

Dog sleds. [via].

Someone really likes Hot Wheels. Jump to 01:12 for the GoPro experience [via].

Lucy feeds his cats (with commentary).

Mouse poop vs. rat poop. The critter in our garage is not a mouse.

“You could die just trying to get out.” Monster surf tops 60 feet (18 January 2018).

On rogue waves: Sebastian Junger‘s 1997 book “The Perfect Storm” describes how they happen. I read the book twice, it was that good. The movie, well, it took a lot of liberties with Junger’s documentary. It’s still worth a watch.

John Moschitta Jr., aka, The Fastest talking man in the world (according to the Guinness Book of World Records) recites “Ya Got Trouble” from The Music Man.

The Fastest talking woman in the world (according to the Guinness Book of World Records) is Fran Capo.

Wanna play Kim Jong Un? Nuke any city on the planet and see the results.

Blue Suede Schubert.

[Top: Tony Clifton graphic found here.]

Saturday Matinee – The Fabulous Bingo Brothers, Neil Innes, Cab Calloway with The Nicholas Bros. and Doug & The Slugs

The Fabulous Bingo Brothers: Eric Idle and Neil Innes ca. 1975.

“Protest Song.” I remember this parody of Bob Dylan by Neil Innes. “I suffered for my music, and now it’s your turn.”

I attempted to play that song years ago: the vocals, harmonica and guitar parts are easy, but I discovered that I can’t do any two of them at the same time. More recently I found that I can’t type transcripts from audio either, no matter how much I slow down the recordings. I guess it’s a brain fluke, or maybe it’s tied into being left-handed. I dunno, Babs…

Let’s go retro x 1943.

That there’s some incredible dancing that hurts to watch. From the UToobage description:

[It’s] a clip from the movie “Stormy Weather” (1943) featuring Cab Calloway and his orchestra performing “Jumpin Jive”. After awhile they let the Nicholas Brothers jump in and lend their feet to the action.